IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 1.5

the plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today

#plans #show #harbour
the plans below give some information about illustrating all the changes that have aquired in Porth harbour from 2000
and
Change preposition
to and
show examples
 present year.
overall
,some places have changed in the harbour since 2000
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
adding many leisure facilities like cafes and shops and
renovation
Replace the word
renovating
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the castle which
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
has been a hotel on the south
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
map.
firstly
, two maps indicate some information about restoring the harbour that
in
Add a missing verb
is in
show examples
 the
pas
Correct your spelling
past
show examples
.
Therefore
,the marina(private
yatchs
Correct your spelling
yachts
)and fishing boats switched to another location.
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
show examples
 nowadays the entrance of the southern
carpark
Correct your spelling
car park
 has been
rejuvanated
Correct your spelling
rejuvenated
 to the main road on the west side . probing ahead,the public beach near
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the castle has
bees
Correct your spelling
been
show examples
 converted to
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 private beach for the hotel.
Additionally
Add a comma
Additionally,
show examples
 a novel duck was created next to the other duck.
az
Rephrase
As
show examples
 well
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
in the left part of the map,the extra shower and toilet have
manufactured
Add a missing verb
been manufactured
show examples
 between two car parks.
Submitted by melicanamdari on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar
Focus on improving grammatical accuracy, especially with subject-verb agreement and tense consistency.
clarity
Clarify your ideas by using simpler sentence structures and clearly indicating the changes, possibly with bullet points or lists, to break down complex information.
task achievement
The essay successfully identifies several significant changes in the harbour from 2000 to the present day, such as the addition of leisure facilities and renovation of the castle.
coherence
There is a logical attempt to describe changes in sequence, reflecting an understanding of how to compare past and present features.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • multi-purpose building
  • recreational facilities
  • maritime safety
  • leisure destination
  • tourism-focused
  • infrastructure improvements
  • pedestrian promenade
  • landmark
  • expanded roads
  • transport infrastructure
  • industrial use
  • cruise ship terminal
What to do next:
Look at other essays: