The crime rate nowadays is decreasing compared to the past due to advance tech which can prevent and solve crime. Do you agree or disagree?

In recent years, as technology
got
Wrong verb form
has become
show examples
more advanced, we witnessed many changes in the world including security services mostly provided by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
governments to reduce crimes and increase efficiency. One example could be the need
of signing
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to sign
show examples
up with all your personal info to use
diferent
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different
web based
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web-based
show examples
servises
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services
. So,
i
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I
show examples
tend to agree with the topic.
Firstly
, in many countries the potential of tech and
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the internet
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
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to make life better, was taken
seriouse
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seriously
serious
and some moves were made.
For example
,
nawadays
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nowadays
even the
entry level
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entry-level
show examples
stuff in daily life
need
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needs
show examples
you to give all your personal data to the government. As an example, I can refer to '
oppening
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opening
a bank account'. As for the past, things used to be different.
Although
, many
stpes
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steps
for doing the same task
remaind simiular
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remained similar
, in the past data was stored
in
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on
show examples
paper, which was not easy to track compared to being stored on a server.
Nawadays
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Nowadays
, it has
became
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become
show examples
much simpler for the federal
athourities
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authorities
to track someone.
Secondly
, the fact that favoured
this
action
alot
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a lot
, was that people
can
Wrong verb form
could
show examples
not avoid it. I mean, the need to be verified and being
back ground
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background
show examples
checked is an integral
parts
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part
show examples
of our lives now.
For instance
, even for signing up
to
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for
show examples
a university in many nations, people need to be checked.
This
was not so efficient in the old days, resulting in
much
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a much
show examples
smaller room for any wrong
behavior
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behaviour
show examples
by a person.
also
,
nawadays
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nowadays
there are cameras
every where
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everywhere
show examples
, making it even harder for any
wrong doing
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wrongdoing
show examples
. In conclusion,
along with
less
paper work
Correct your spelling
paperwork
show examples
to do simple tasks, technology
also
helped security by
alot
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lot
as people always know that their information is
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the right hands and it is easy to get
cought
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caught
, making them reconsider if any bad plans are in mind. These were some
reosens
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reasons
why I agreed to the question.
Submitted by Taha Sol. on

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task achievement
To improve your task response, try to provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points. This can make your argument stronger and more convincing.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, consider using more linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly. This can help guide the reader through your arguments more effectively.
task achievement
Your essay clearly highlights the significance of technology in reducing crime rates, which demonstrates a good understanding of the topic.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are present and effectively frame your argument.
logical structure
The essay follows a logical structure with distinct paragraphs for different points, which aids in readability.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • surveillance technology
  • CCTV cameras
  • facial recognition software
  • forensic science
  • DNA analysis
  • electronic databases
  • cybercrime monitoring
  • digital forensics
  • predictive policing
  • data analysis
  • artificial intelligence
  • community policing
  • public safety
  • crime prevention
  • crime solution
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