Some people think that young people should spend more and more of their free time with their families, and spend less time entertaining outside. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The debate over whether the youth should devote a huge amount of leisure time to family events or if they ought to pass the time by doing outdoor activities remains contentious. Some argue that spending time with the family allows youngsters to strengthen their bonds and gain life experience
while
the opponents of
this
view claim that outdoor amusements play a crucial role in developing soft skills like teamwork and stress management.
This
essay will elucidate both viewpoints and offer a personal perspective.
Submitted by pandatvin3 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure to provide specific examples or evidence to support your points. This will enhance the strength of your argument and demonstrate a well-rounded understanding of the topic.
Task Achievement
Develop your main points further in the body paragraphs with substantial support and explanations. This will improve the comprehensiveness of your response.
Coherence and Cohesion
In order to achieve stronger coherence and cohesion, aim to connect your main points more explicitly by using linking words and phrases.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction clearly outlines the debate and sets the stage for discussing both viewpoints, which is a strong aspect of the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
The structure is logically organized with an introduction indicating what will be presented in the essay, leading nicely into the essay’s body.
Task Achievement
Using terms like 'strengthen their bonds,' 'gain life experience,' 'soft skills,' and 'stress management' shows a good command of vocabulary relevant to the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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