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Writing Samples
Band 8

People have to spend more and more time to travel their homes for jobs and study. What are the reasons? How can wo solve this problem?

#people #time #travel #homes #jobs #study
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Nowadays people tend to spend increasingly more time coming home from work and institutions and back. There are a few reasons for
this
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 trend;
however
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, the primary one is the price increase in the transportation sector, and in order to diminish possible effects some measures like the placement of free transport should be implemented. There is a firm belief that
this
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 problem is mainly caused by the rising prices, and it is particularly true since a rising number of the population is no longer able to afford taxis and other vehicle rentals making their commute longer.
Additionally
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, public transit systems are often overcrowded and unreliable, which forces individuals to turn to more expensive private transportation options,
further
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 extending their travel time.
On the other hand
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, some steps must be taken to prevent the spread of
this
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 very problem.
Therefore
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, a possible solution I can suggest is the establishment of centres which will offer its customers free bikes and other transport modes without a charge, which will definitely result in positive outcomes. These initiatives could encourage people to use more sustainable modes of transportation, reduce traffic congestion, lessen the
overall
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 financial burden, and more importantly - return the amount of time they spend on commuting to its original value. In conclusion,
although
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 an extended commute might lead to potential setbacks and unpleasant consequences, fortunately, some preventive measures like the establishment of specialized centres offering free transit options could provide an effective solution. These centres would not only help reduce commuting times and costs but
also
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 contribute to environmental sustainability and
overall
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 well-being, offering a positive outlook for the future.
Submitted by shermadovs on

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task achievement
Consider providing more specific examples to enhance the depth of analysis and strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph is explicitly connected to the central argument to improve coherence.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion within the topic.
task achievement
The response addresses both parts of the task effectively, discussing both reasons and solutions.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • urban sprawl
  • suburban
  • rural areas
  • property prices
  • commute
  • public transport
  • traffic congestion
  • peak hours
  • centralization
  • urbanized areas
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