Many people around the world use social media every day to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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In the modern era, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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people
Use synonyms
use social
media
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in everyday for their
communication
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communicate
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between the surrounding
people
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to get daily updates
of
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on
show examples
the news.
However
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,
people
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keep
touch
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in touch
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with others, I disagree
with
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that
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advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
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is
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are
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not
overweigh
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outweigh
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the disadvantages because there are some reasons
such
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as spending social
media
Use synonyms
will ruin
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people
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people's
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morality, health issues and
also
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it will affect
careers
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career
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growth.
To begin
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with, many
people
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are using mobile
phone
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phones
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in their
day to day
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day-to-day
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activities
especially
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, especially
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social
media
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, and they
spent
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spend
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too much time
for
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on
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this
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application for
the
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apply
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communication with
the
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apply
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neighbors and friends and
unfortunately
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unfortunately,
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it
brings
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makes
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out sick.
For instance
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, one of my
cousin
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cousin's
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brother
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brothers
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,
he
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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spent more than a time
for
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on
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
, particularly,
whats app
Correct your spelling
WhatsApp
show examples
,
facebook
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Facebook
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and
twitter
Capitalize word
Twitter
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
usage makes him mentally sick and
have
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has
show examples
the
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apply
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severe
head ache
Correct your spelling
headache
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,
still
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still,
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he is on meditation.
Additionally
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, it will ruin the
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people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
morality even
some
Correct word choice
if some
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people
Use synonyms
are active in the office working hours because of the addiction and
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moreover
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moreover,
show examples
it will affect the career growth development
such
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as lazy activity and
receives
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receiving
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negative comments from the superior.
On the other hand
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,
people
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are get
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get
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well connected with
the
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their
show examples
neighbors
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neighbours
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and families easily.
For example
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,
people
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, who
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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in
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on
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can observe some hot news about politics, sports, cinema,
geography
Correct word choice
and geography
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, and
also
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they can chat to find or explore new things differently.
Apart from
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this
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,
people
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can share their
opinion
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opinions
show examples
who
Correct word choice
and
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can connect for
the
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apply
show examples
good
protest
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protests
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in
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on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
platform
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platforms
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and they can
also
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intimate to
people
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as
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apply
show examples
whether warnings or festivals sharing.
To conclude
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, there are many
people
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using social
media
Use synonyms
has some advantages to
know
Wrong verb form
knowing
show examples
about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
daily news information and
also
Linking Words
there are some disadvantages
such
Linking Words
as spoiling their character,
continuous
Correct word choice
and continuous
show examples
usage of mobile
will suffer
Verb problem
causes
show examples
health
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
and
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also
Rephrase
apply
show examples
career
down
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apply
show examples
. in my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
I would say
this
Linking Words
kind of usage of social
media
Use synonyms
is not
advantages
Replace the word
advantageous
show examples
is to
over weigh
Correct your spelling
overweigh
show examples
the disadvantages
Submitted by saravanan.ko2011 on

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coherence cohesion
Improve clarity by organizing ideas in a more logical order, breaking down complex sentences, and using clearer transitions between points.
task achievement
Ensure each paragraph fully develops an idea, with examples that directly relate to the main point of the paragraph.
task achievement
Balance the coverage of both advantages and disadvantages; currently, the focus seems more on the disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are both present and recognizable, with a stated position.
task achievement
The essay attempts to address the task by discussing both advantages and disadvantages of social media use.
task achievement
Some relevant examples are provided, like the story about a cousin's social media usage affecting his health.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • facilitate
  • geographically separated
  • fostering
  • connectivity
  • instant communication
  • real-time information
  • misinformation
  • rigorous checks and balances
  • fake news
  • addictive nature
  • detract
  • face-to-face interactions
  • mental health
  • awareness of limitations
What to do next:
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