IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people say that the current level of air travel is acceptable where as other people believe air travel should be reduced and the government should play a role in this. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

#people #level #air #travel #government #role
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Traviling
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Travelling
 is a cornerstone of human life, but recent
advancement
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advancements
show examples
 in technology has
transormed
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transformed
 the way we travel. Over
years
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the years
show examples
,
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air planes
Correct your spelling
airplanes
show examples
 have become increasingly popular than
Correct article usage
the tradional
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tradional
Correct your spelling
traditional
way
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ways
show examples
. In my. opinion, the current
level
Use synonyms
 of
air
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traviling
Correct your spelling
travelling
 is acceptable
due to
Linking Words
 the
safety
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 and the
Use synonyms
economy
Replace the word
economic
show examples
 growth. To
begun
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begin
show examples
 with, the latest
level
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 of
air
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 travel is acceptable because of the
safety
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 of people who are on the
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air planes
Correct your spelling
aeroplanes
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
air
Use synonyms
traveling
Replace the word
travel
show examples
 is the
most savest
Verb problem
safest
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transportaion
Correct your spelling
transportation
 way people have
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
tried, there are
no
Correct your spelling
not
show examples
 many risks
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the sky
camparing
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compared
 with the
earth
Capitalize word
Earth
show examples
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, Recent research by the
university
Capitalize word
University
show examples
 of Prince Sultan has shown that 99.9%
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
flights
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the sky
without
Add a missing verb
are without
show examples
 any
damages
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damage
show examples
. In brief,
traviling
Correct your spelling
travelling
on
Change preposition
by
show examples
air
Use synonyms
 is better for individuals for
rate
Add an article
the rate
a rate
show examples
 of
safety
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 and fewer bad
efffects
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effects
.
In addition
Linking Words
, a
hight
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high
show examples
percent
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percentage
show examples
 of
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economy
Correct article usage
the economy
show examples
 depends on
air
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, which
mean
Change the verb form
means
show examples
 we can not reduce the
currnet
Correct your spelling
current
level
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 of
air
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 travel.
For example
Linking Words
, many goods
onboard
Correct your spelling
board
show examples
of
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apply
show examples
the
Use synonyms
air planes
Correct your spelling
aeroplanes
show examples
,
reducing
Correct word choice
and reducing
show examples
 them will
make
Verb problem
cause
show examples
Use synonyms
economy
Replace the word
economic
show examples
issue
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issues
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, we are in
speed
Correct article usage
a speed
show examples
 era,
reducing
Correct word choice
and reducing
show examples
 the range of
air
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traviling
Correct your spelling
travel
 will
make leeds
Verb problem
lead
show examples
 us to go back. In short,
air
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taving
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having
saving
 is
crucail
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crucial
 for the
accelaration
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acceleration
 of
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economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
. In conclusion, I believe that our rate
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 sky
traviling
Correct your spelling
travelling
 is good, as the
risless
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rich
 and
wealth nation
Replace the word
wealthy national
show examples
improvments
Correct your spelling
improvements
improvement
,
safety
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 and
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economy
Correct article usage
the economy
show examples
 are the two
mean
Correct word choice
main
show examples
 reasons to keep the current
level
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, and
also
Linking Words
 I suggest that to stay
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the same
level
Use synonyms
, even we increase it if it needs.
Submitted by abdallah550603 on

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coherence cohesion
Work on clearer structuring of paragraphs with topic sentences, supporting examples, and explanations. Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea that's well-organized.
task achievement
Include more detailed examples and explanations to support your arguments. This can help to strengthen your response and make your essay more persuasive.
task achievement
Improve the completeness of your response by thoroughly exploring both sides of the argument in detail. Offer an equal amount of discussion for each perspective before presenting your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame your discussion.
task achievement
You successfully identified two main reasons (safety and economic growth) for maintaining current levels of air travel.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • aviation industry
  • global economy
  • carbon footprint
  • greenhouse gas emissions
  • technological advancements
  • sustainable alternatives
  • noise pollution
  • high-speed rail networks
  • incentivize
  • green aviation technologies
  • fuel efficiency
  • cultural exchanges
  • personal and professional relationships
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