IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries, younger people are forgetting their old and traditional languages. Discuss this issue.

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In numerous nations, younger generations are forgetting or destroying their mother tongue;
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while
Correct word choice
apply
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my personal attitude toward
this
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 is that they must keep their traditional
language
Use synonyms
 to communicate with their ancestors and should keep these languages alive. The idea provokes strong arguments, which will be explained here. On the one hand, many young
people
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 would
like
Add the particle
like to
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 speak in
the
Correct article usage
a
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 modern
language
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 , that
are
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is
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comfort
Replace the word
comfortable
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 and
make
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makes
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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better
sence
Correct your spelling
sense
science
,even though,
this
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 can be rejected.
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This
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apply
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,it is argued that many
people
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 would like to show them that they have a sophisticated and urban personality.
Furthermore
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, It depends on the surrender that every individual
live
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lives
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, in terms of imagine boys and girls who grow
in
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up in
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village
Correct article usage
a village
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 have different methods
in
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of
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 speaking, they like to speak like local
people
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,
while
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,
this
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 trend differs among urbanians, they have faced
with
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apply
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many
people
Use synonyms
 with different words.
For instance
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, some
of
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apply
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student
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students
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 who
they
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apply
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are accepted to university, when they attend class and visit other kinds of
people
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 to speak,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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may
make
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feel
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a
Correct article usage
apply
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shame
Correct your spelling
ashamed
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with
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apply
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them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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to speak in a local
language
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. The best solution is that
,
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apply
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 the governments should make many festivals to encourage younger
people
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 to keep their mother tongue alive. The other side of
this
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 debate is that
,
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apply
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 parents
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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push the pressure of
speak
Wrong verb form
speaking
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 natively to connect with their ancestors and keep their identities, which may be accepted by some
part
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parts
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 of
societies
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society
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.
This
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being
Wrong verb form
is
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 the case
is that
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;
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,
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apply
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 our
old
Fix the agreement mistake
older
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 generations have innovative
lifestyle
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lifestyles
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 and customs that will be healthy and can impact
on
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apply
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our mental health.
For example
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, most
of
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apply
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grand parents
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grandparents
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 are knowledgeable and experienced and younger
people
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 can gain a host of experiences
by
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from
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 them.
To conclude
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, it appears that the aim of these opinions is admirable, but keeping our identity by using traditional
language
Use synonyms
 is a longer-term thoughtful program that we practically
recon
Verb problem
rely
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 on the government to manage.

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task achievement
The essay addresses the topic, but the main argument could be presented more clearly at the beginning to set a strong foundation.
task achievement
Work on developing each point in more detail. Provide clear connections and elaborations to make arguments more persuasive and coherent.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to clarity and grammar to enhance the readability and comprehension of your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Enhance logical connections between points to improve the argument flow and cohesion.
task achievement
Good attempt to address both sides of the debate on language preservation among younger generations.
coherence cohesion
Effort to provide examples and real-life scenarios enhances understanding of your points.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are present, creating a structured response.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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