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Band 5

In many countries, younger people are forgetting their old and traditional languages. Discuss this issue.

#countries #people #languages
In numerous nations, younger generations are forgetting or destroying their mother tongue;
while
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apply
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my personal attitude toward
this
 is that they must keep their traditional
language
 to communicate with their ancestors and should keep these languages alive. The idea provokes strong arguments, which will be explained here. On the one hand, many young
people
 would
like
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like to
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 speak in
the
Correct article usage
a
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 modern
language
 , that
are
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is
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comfort
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comfortable
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 and
make
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makes
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a
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apply
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better
sence
Correct your spelling
sense
science
,even though,
this
 can be rejected.
This
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apply
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,it is argued that many
people
 would like to show them that they have a sophisticated and urban personality.
Furthermore
, It depends on the surrender that every individual
live
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lives
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, in terms of imagine boys and girls who grow
in
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up in
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village
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a village
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 have different methods
in
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of
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 speaking, they like to speak like local
people
,
while
,
this
 trend differs among urbanians, they have faced
with
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apply
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many
people
 with different words.
For instance
, some
of
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student
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students
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 who
they
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are accepted to university, when they attend class and visit other kinds of
people
 to speak,
they
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apply
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may
make
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feel
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a
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apply
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shame
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ashamed
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with
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apply
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them
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apply
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to speak in a local
language
. The best solution is that
,
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 the governments should make many festivals to encourage younger
people
 to keep their mother tongue alive. The other side of
this
 debate is that
,
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apply
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 parents
to
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apply
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push the pressure of
speak
Wrong verb form
speaking
show examples
 natively to connect with their ancestors and keep their identities, which may be accepted by some
part
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parts
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 of
societies
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society
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.
This
being
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is
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 the case
is that
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;
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,
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apply
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 our
old
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older
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 generations have innovative
lifestyle
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lifestyles
show examples
 and customs that will be healthy and can impact
on
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apply
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our mental health.
For example
, most
of
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apply
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grand parents
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grandparents
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 are knowledgeable and experienced and younger
people
 can gain a host of experiences
by
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from
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 them.
To conclude
, it appears that the aim of these opinions is admirable, but keeping our identity by using traditional
language
 is a longer-term thoughtful program that we practically
recon
Verb problem
rely
show examples
 on the government to manage.
Submitted by takhtejamshid1400historikal on

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task achievement
The essay addresses the topic, but the main argument could be presented more clearly at the beginning to set a strong foundation.
task achievement
Work on developing each point in more detail. Provide clear connections and elaborations to make arguments more persuasive and coherent.
coherence cohesion
Pay attention to clarity and grammar to enhance the readability and comprehension of your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Enhance logical connections between points to improve the argument flow and cohesion.
task achievement
Good attempt to address both sides of the debate on language preservation among younger generations.
coherence cohesion
Effort to provide examples and real-life scenarios enhances understanding of your points.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are present, creating a structured response.

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