In some countries good school and medical facilities are available in city only. Some people think that teachers and good hospital, education should be provided in rural areas for few years. While some people think that every person is free to do work according to their choice. Discuss your ideas and opinion. Discuss both the sides.

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NOWADAYS, BETTER EDUCATION AND HEALTHCARE
SYSTEM
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SYSTEMS

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ARE ACCESSIBLE ONLY IN
CITIES
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. SOME
PEOPLE
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CLAIM THAT NOT ONLY
CITIES
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,
Remove the comma
apply

The comma before the conjunction BUT appears to be unnecessary. Consider removing it.

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BUT
ALSO
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RURAL
AREAS
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SHOULD HAVE ACCESS TO SCHOOLS AND MEDICAL SYSTEM,
WHILE
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OTHERS SAY THAT IT DEPENDS ON
INDIVIDUAL'S
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THE INDIVIDUAL'S

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CHOICE ,AS THEY ARE INDEPENDENT.
THIS
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ESSAY WILL DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS IN SUPPORT OF FORMER. ON THE ONE HAND,
PEOPLE
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THINK THAT THEY HAVE
CHOICE
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A CHOICE

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INDEPENDENCE
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OF INDEPENDENCE

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, WHEREVER THEY CAN WORK, APART FROM THAT
PEOPLE
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'S
CHOICE
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CHOICES

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RELIED
Wrong verb form
RELY

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ON THEIR LIFE CONDITIONS
,
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apply

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AND SKILLS. PERSONAL FREEDOM CAN
LED
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LEAD
BE LED

The verb LED after the modal verb CAN does not appear to be in the correct form. Consider changing the verb form.

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TO THE SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENTS AND CAREER PROSPECTS, WORKING IN AN ENVIRONMENT WHERE
INDIVIUDALS
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INDIVIDUALS

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FEELING
Wrong verb form
FEEL

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HAPPY
IT
Correct pronoun usage
apply

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CAN BE RESULTED IN THE EFFECTIVE OUTCOMES.
FOR INSTANCE
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, AFTER GRADUATING
UNIVERSITY
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FROM UNIVERSITY

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DOCTORS ARE GIVEN CHANCES TO SELECT WHERE THEY WORK, EITHER IN
CITIES
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OR RURAL
AREAS
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, EVEN
THOUGH
Correct word choice
apply

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OVERSEAS.
ON THE OTHER HAND
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,
WHICH
Correct pronoun usage
apply

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I SIDE WITH THOSE WHO STRONGLY CLAIM THAT RURAL
AREAS
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HAVE TO ACCESS HIGH-QUALITY EDUCATION AND MEDICAL
SERVICES
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. ENFORCING MANDATORY
SERVICES
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WOULD PREVENT
MIGRATION
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THE MIGRATION

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OF
PEOPLE
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IN RURAL
AREAS
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,
AS WELL AS
Linking Words

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URBANIZATION. WHAT I MEAN BY THAT,
IN
Add a missing verb
IS IN

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ORDER TO
GETTING
Change the verb
GET

It appears that the verb GETTING should be in the base form as part of the to-infinitive following IN ORDER. Consider changing the verb form.

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BETTER EDUCATION STUDENTS MOVE FROM THEIR
HOMETOWN
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HOMETOWNS

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TO
CITIES
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IT
Correct pronoun usage
WHICH

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RESULTED
Wrong verb form
RESULTS

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IN DENSELY-POPULATED CITY LIFE AND FEELING HOMESICKNESS.
ADDITIONALLY
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, MOVING FROM
CITIES
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TO RURAL LIFE IS THE WAY
FOR GETTING
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TO GET

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AWAY FROM
HUSTLE
Correct article usage
THE HUSTLE

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AND BUSTLE OF
CITIES
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,
ALSO
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

SOME
PEOPLE
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MIGHT BE UNAWARE OF
LIFESTYLE
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THE LIFESTYLE

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OF RURAL
AREAS
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, BY
THIS
Linking Words

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WAY THEY CAN BROADEN
HORIZONS
Correct pronoun usage
THEIR HORIZONS

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AND
GETTING
Wrong verb form
GET

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BETTER
Correct article usage
A BETTER

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LIFESTYLE. MANDATORY
SERVICES
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CAN LED TO GROWTH IN THE NUMBER OF EDUCATED
PEOPLE
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AND PROFESSIONALS.
TO CONCLUDE
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, BOTH SIDES MIGHT BE RIGHT TO
CERTAIN
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A CERTAIN

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DEGREE,
HOWEVER
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Add a comma
,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase HOWEVER. Consider adding a comma.

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I BELIEVE THAT MANDATORY
SERVICES
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

IN RURAL
AREAS
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

CAN
BE CONTRIBUTED
Wrong verb form
CONTRIBUTE

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SIGNIFICANT
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TO SIGNIFICANT

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DEVELOPMENTS.

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coherence cohesion
Try to enhance the logical structure by creating a clearer and more logically organized response. Make sure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next with appropriate transitions.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to illustrate your points, which can enhance both clarity and support for your arguments. It aids in making your essay more compelling.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all main points are sufficiently supported and developed. This will improve the clarity and impact of your essay.
task achievement
Good attempt at discussing both perspectives, which shows a balanced approach and understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your argument effectively and provides closure to your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • governmental funding
  • concentration of resources
  • specialists
  • inequality gap
  • sustainable development
  • urban migration
  • overpopulation
  • mandatory service
  • societal development
  • quality of life
  • demotivation
  • dissatisfaction
  • flexibility
  • autonomy
  • career placements
  • innovation
  • excellence
  • drain of skilled professionals
  • incentives
  • balanced approach
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