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Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think there is a lot we can do to stop felonies, while others believe it is either too hard or even impossible. This essay will look at both sides of the argument and share my own opinion on the matter.

#people #felonies #argument #matter
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On one side,
people
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 who support stronger measures argue that proactive steps can make a real difference in reducing
crime
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.
For example
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, community policing helps build trust between law enforcement and regular
people
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, making it easier to prevent
crimes
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 or report suspicious activity. Investing in education and job opportunities is another big factor since it tackles the root causes of
crime
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, like poverty and unemployment. Technology
also
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 plays a role—things like advanced surveillance systems or artificial intelligence could help law enforcement predict and stop
crimes
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 before they happen. On the other side, some believe that
crime
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 is just a fact of life. They argue that human nature,
along with
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 things like greed, desperation, or mental health issues, will always push some
people
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 to commit
crimes
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. Critics
also
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 point out that no matter how much we prepare, some
crimes
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—like
crimes
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 of passion—happen in the heat of the moment and can’t really be predicted or prevented. In my view,
while
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 we will probably never get rid of
crime
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 completely, there are plenty of things we can do to reduce how often it happens. Combining social programs, modern policing, and even advances in mental health care can address both the reasons
people
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 commit
crimes
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 and how we deal with them when they do. So,
while
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 perfection might be out of reach, we should aim to make things better wherever we can.
Submitted by moon2014angel on

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relevant specific examples
To enhance your essay, consider adding more specific examples or statistics to strengthen your arguments.
introduction conclusion present
Expand on the conclusion by summarizing the main points more explicitly to reinforce your argument.
complete response
Your essay provides a balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument, which is essential for a high score in task achievement.
logical structure
Logical structure and clear progression of ideas make your essay easy to follow.
introduction conclusion present
Introduction and conclusion are present, giving your essay a complete framework.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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