IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some think secondary and high school students should be allowed to choose academic courses leading to university or practical courses leading to careers such as carpenters. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#think #school #students #courses #university #careers #carpenters
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There is no denying the fact that
students
Use synonyms
 in high and secondary
school
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 need to take academic
courses
Use synonyms
 before
university
Use synonyms
.
While
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 it is a commonly held
belife
Correct your spelling
belief
 that no need to choose academic
courses
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. There is
also
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 an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider that
courses
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 before
university
Use synonyms
well
Correct your spelling
will
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 help
students
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 to be
a
Change preposition
at a
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high level.
To begin
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 with,
people
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 think that academic
courses
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 a
wasting
Fix the agreement mistake
waste of
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 time.
In other words
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, some parents not helping their kids to go to the
traning
Correct your spelling
training
school
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 before they go to
university
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school
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 because they think it is wasting their time and money.
In addition
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, training
school
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 or personal
trainigs
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trainings
training
usuly
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usually
 help
students
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 to be better.
For example
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, most doctors and teachers tell always about
developmet
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development
 our self
usuly
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usually
 to be
Add an article
a success
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success
Replace the word
successful
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. Another point to consider, social work recently
was help
Change the verb form
helped
show examples
people
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 to arrive
most
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at most
show examples
website
Fix the agreement mistake
websites
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 for education. It is
also
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 possible to say that apps and Education links that
students
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 sharing between they to each other help the kids
how
Correct word choice
who
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 can not pay
to
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for
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
academic
Fix the agreement mistake
academics
show examples
.
Moreover
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, some
family
Fix the agreement mistake
families
show examples
 see
thats
Correct your spelling
that
places
Correct article usage
the places
show examples
 for
teeching
Correct your spelling
teaching
teething
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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expencive
Correct your spelling
expensive
 and it is
defficults
Correct your spelling
difficult
 to complete with
thim
Correct your spelling
them
.
For instance
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, at
this
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 time it is easy to find
subject
Add an article
a subject
the subject
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 to read
it
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apply
show examples
or solve
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
in
Change preposition
for
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 free. In conclusion, despite
people
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 having different views, I
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
 that
people
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 need
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
education and development in
they
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 live and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 see
its
Correct pronoun usage
it
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important
Change preposition
as important
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 to be smart and intelligent to find
every thing
Correct your spelling
everything
show examples
 in future at
university
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 is easy, and if some
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 can not find answers or can not solve
some thing
Correct your spelling
something
show examples
, he can get help from friends.
Submitted by a.noora16031 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Begin with a clear thesis statement outlining your position on the topic. Make sure each paragraph develops only one main idea. Link your paragraphs and ideas with appropriate cohesion devices. You should also aim to eliminate repetition and ensure the essay flows well.
Task Achievement
Address all parts of the task and present a clear opinion throughout the essay. Ensure your ideas are developed and explained well.
Task Achievement
Provide specific examples and details in your support. Avoid vague explanations and enhance detail where possible.
Task Achievement
Attempts to address the topic with an introduction and conclusion. Shows understanding of the importance of an academic education before university.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is structured with an introduction, at least two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
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