Some people think that the government should make laws regarding nutrition and healthy lifestyle, while others think that it is a matter of personal choice and personal responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
There are discussions about, some
people
saying that the government
should impose on citizens a healthy lifestyle
. whereas
, others believe that it is an individual choice that can not be interfered with. But the real question is, if the government
makes this
decision is it beneficial to these people
?
government
should encourage their citizens on lifestyle
instead
of imposing them because it is difficult to control all the people
in the city even if the government
imposed tax or fines this
can impact society in a negative way. The government
can interested
in healthy lifestyles. like, providing clubs in different areas with affordable prices Add a missing verb
be interested
also
offers or discounts on healthy food. For example
, in Saudi Arabia government
created places specially for walking with all tools for exercise.
Sometimes people
do not have the motivation or insistence for a healthy lifestyle
. To be more specific, their lifestyle
has wrong habits such
as too much fat and eating in large quantities without any control. As well as
personal solutions have more effectiveness than government
rules because sometimes health awareness could be more effective in behaviour changes. For instance
, an awareness campaign about the dangers of smoking,
may encourage a lot of Remove the comma
apply
people
to quit smoking rather than smoking strongly banned by the government
.
In conclusion, it is hard to impose people
on a healthy lifestyle
however
, there are various ways to encourage the community about healthy. So in my perspective, a healthy lifestyle
is a personal choice but with the help of government
, we can increase the percentage of healthy people
.Submitted by waad.balubaid on
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task achievement
Although the essay presents both sides of the argument, it can be improved by providing deeper analysis and clearer articulation of ideas. For instance, explore specific reasons why government-imposed regulations may or may not be effective.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas more logically. Improve transitions between sentences to maintain a smooth flow. For example, rather than starting a sentence with 'Like', consider transitioning ideas by saying 'For example' or similar linking phrases
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, encapsulating the main ideas and stance effectively.
task achievement
The use of real-life examples, such as the case in Saudi Arabia, strengthens the argument by providing concrete illustrations of points discussed.
Your opinion
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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?