Internet addiction How serious is this problem among young people where you live, and what can be done about it?
The
Internet
might be the biggest sensation of the 20th century. Back then
people
would have not even imagined what an essential part of an individual’s life this
invention would become. It's no brainer
that Add a hyphen
no-brainer
this
ever-developing technology is used widely in today’s world. Young people
are the largest portion of the internet
users. But how much does it cost to be online almost 24/7? Is it harmful or useful after all?
First and foremost, it’s certain that the internet
has two sides, one of which is beneficial and the other one is rather dangerous. There is no doubt that this
invention majorly helps people
with doing research on a
various topics, Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
offers
a myriad of online services, Correct word choice
and offers
such
as making an appointment with a doctor, buying plane tickets, using
digital maps to travel around the world with no need to leave your home or texting Correct word choice
and using
people
that live on the other side of the planet. However
, as much as it is helpful and convenient, there seems to be a serious issue among young people
regarding the usage of this
recource
. Most youngsters are glued to their cell Correct your spelling
resource
phones
, leading to a few severe consequences. Firstly
, the content on their phones
or other devices capture
their attention entirely, making it difficult to stay in the present moment, communicate with real Change the verb form
captures
people
or even observe the environment without a
need Correct article usage
the
of scrolling
. Change preposition
to scroll
For instance
, whenever I use public transportation, I observe passengers’ behaviour and most children or young adults are fixated on their phones
, isn't it pitiful? They definitely spend too much time on social media, which causes their attention spans shorten
and the tendency Fix the infinitive
to shorten
of comparing
Change preposition
to compare
yourself
to online personalities has Correct pronoun usage
themselves
a
great damage Remove the article
apply
on
Change preposition
to
people
’s self-esteem. It can not only affect mental health,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
cause long-term harm to their sight or posture as they lean their necks towards their devices. In addition
, students tend to put less effort into their assignments, as more and more artificial intelegince
platforms are doing the hard work for them. What is the quality of education, Correct your spelling
intelligence
then
? Even if there are clear benefits of
using the Change preposition
to
internet
, the harm to young people
is also
undeniable.
So, what can be done about this
problem? If a person is conscious enough about their internet
addiction, they can set limits to their most used
apps or platforms or use specific programs that are there to block the selected content. Social media lovers, Add a hyphen
most-used
on the other hand
, could use a trick of social media detox, to live a few weeks without it. As for the students, schools should be more strict about the usage of the
Correct article usage
apply
phones
and gather them while
the test is taken, encourage students to join clubs, spend more time outside, find new hobbies or educate young people
about the dark side of the internet
and the consequences that may occur after overusing it. Hence
, there are some solutions that may make this
issue less severe.
In a nutshell, the internet
is a great source for different reasons, but it’s also
harmful, especially for young people
. However
, there are also
solutions for this
issue, to make sure that the addiction of
living online Change preposition
to
would
not harm the lives of Wrong verb form
will
the
future generations.Correct article usage
apply
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task achievement
Try to include specific data or research studies to support your points about internet addiction. This would provide more depth and credibility.
coherence cohesion
Consider enhancing the transitions between paragraphs for improved flow.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a complete and well-rounded response to the prompt by discussing both the seriousness of internet addiction among young people and potential solutions.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a logical structure with a clear introduction and conclusion, contributing to good coherence.
task achievement
Examples, such as observations of young people on public transportation, are relevant and help to illustrate key points.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example