IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world. Do you think this is a positive or negative development

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There is no denying the fact that having access to different kinds of international
foods
Use synonyms
 is considered a new development in all regions in recent years.
While
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 it is a
community held
Add a hyphen
community-held
show examples
 belief that the expansion of food Is a significant part of all over the world, there is
also
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 an argument that producing
foods
Use synonyms
 for the world has contributed to a negative impact on society. on the one hand, consumers can buy anything they want even if the products come from a foreign country and that affects on profit of the supermarket.
In other words
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, there are a sort of
foods
Use synonyms
 that help the community from allergies
such
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 as milk and flour.
In addition
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, imported
foods
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 give us a new taste and flavour even Chocolate, perhaps kids could eat healthy candy.
For example
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,
Instead
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 of travelling to another region, It is a great idea for to supermarkets afford these
foods
Use synonyms
 in our country.
on the other hand
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, plenty of people do not trust their products , because they have unknown ingredients. It is
also
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 possible to say that not all individuals afford their Flavor
such
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 as Chinese Food, which is really spicy and salty.
Moreover
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, every region has a special taste and not all People like their flavours like Japeness they are eating alive animals.
For instance
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, rather than take their export food from the world, perhaps they create
foods
Use synonyms
 from our country. In conclusion, there are no easy answers to
this
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 question . On balance,
however
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, I tend to believe that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks for several reasons.
Hence
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, it is a Positive development for sensitive people and helps them from allergies.

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Coherence and Cohesion
Work on creating a more structured argument. Currently, the essay's points feel a bit scattered. Try to make sure each paragraph clearly links to the main argument and follows a logical progression.
Task Achievement
Ensure that each main point you present is backed up with clear examples or explanations. This helps illustrate your understanding and provides strength to your arguments.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have included an introduction and conclusion, which is good practice to frame your essay.
Task Achievement
Attempted to provide both sides of the argument, which demonstrates an understanding of the complexity of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • nutrition
  • cultural exposure
  • competitive markets
  • economic boost
  • employment opportunities
  • carbon footprint
  • environmental impact
  • local produce
  • food security
  • global supply chain
  • sustainable practices
  • consumer choice
  • market dynamics
  • price competition
  • agricultural sector
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