IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the number of immigrants to three countries from 1990 to 2001. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of immigrants to three countries from 1990 to 2001. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The line graph shows data on the number of immigrants (in thousand
unit
Change to a plural noun
units
show examples
) to the USA, Canada, and Australia from 1991 to 2001.
Overall
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 Canada and Australia had a quite stable trend, the opposite was true for the USA, which
also
Linking Words
 possessed the largest immigration rate. In terms of America, there were over 1400 people
immigrated
Correct pronoun usage
who immigrated
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
 nation in 1991. After reaching a peak of 1800
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
only one year later, the data of
this
Linking Words
 country witnessed a dramatic fall, to only 1000 immigrants in 1993,
then
Linking Words
 continued to be followed by a gradual decrease during the next 3 years. From 1996 onwards, the immigration rate
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the USA fluctuated from around 650 to 990 individuals.
In contrast
Linking Words
, Canada’s and Australia’s immigration level was reported to be less varied. In Australia, there were approximately 180 people moved here annually throughout the
10 years
Correct your spelling
10-year
 period. A similar trend was
also
Linking Words
 documented in Canada’s data, albeit at a quite higher
firgure
Correct your spelling
figure
, at around 200 individuals.
Addtionally
Correct your spelling
Additionally
, a double increase in
this
Linking Words
 country’s level was
also
Linking Words
 recorded
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • immigration trends
  • significant increase/decrease
  • fluctuation
  • steadily
  • sharp spike/drop
  • over the given period
  • comparative analysis
  • growth pattern
  • immigrant numbers
  • variations
  • main features
  • highlighting
  • stark differences
  • overall trends
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