With the improvements in today’s health care, society has to care for more and more elderly people. Do you feel that society will be able to cope with the increase in numbers of elderly people today and how can it be managed? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.
Regarding healthcare development , a number of elderly communities can access to public health system. Meanwhile, society needs to cope with an increased number of aged people.
Therefore
, several managements are created to deal with an ageing community. The following reasons and examples will be discussed below.
First,
one of the most obvious conductions is promoting fitness and well-being for the elderly population. Many policies should provide accessible treatments and health-reinforcing activities to the elders. For instance
, Chatchart Sittipun, a recent Bangkok incumbent, stated that some policies are arranged to improve better quality of life in the elderly groups such
as strengthening the primary healthcare centre to be more efficient in both preventing and treating diseases or creating ageing clusters for doing various activities together in the public space for enhancing health. In addition
, providing more jobs to elderly society is optional to the ones who are still eager to make a living is one of the solutions. A career not only makes value to a jobber but also
stimulates the economy in general.
On the other hand
, preparing younger generations to be ready to get older in the future is as crucial as solving when they already are seniors. Especially in finance, the government should educate about allocating money from the first grade of school to graduating. Retirement plan also
should be added as an annual important meeting in each company. To illustrate this
, the Bank of Thailand suggested that young adults should know their own income and monthly expenses to assess and plan further
retirement years for comfortable living.
To conclude
, people are able to live longer due to
an improvement in the healthcare system. Handling to ageing society is supporting welfare and also
necessary to initiate financial planning courses for younger ones.Submitted by amittawin on
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task achievement
The essay addresses the question but could benefit from more focus on directly answering the main points of the prompt. For example, consider more explicit discussion on whether society will be able to cope.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure each paragraph flows logically into the next. Some transitions between ideas could be smoother to improve the overall coherence.
task achievement
Strengthen the main points with clearer examples and more detailed explanations. Include personal experience or data to add weight to your arguments.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which help to frame the main discussion points well.
task achievement
Good use of examples, such as referencing public figures and organizations, adds credibility.
task achievement
The essay does well in suggesting concrete solutions, such as promoting fitness and financial planning.
Your opinion
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