IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The charts below show the performance of a bus company in terms of punctuality, both actual and target (what actually happened compared to what the company was trying to achieve) Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the performance of a bus company in terms of punctuality, both actual and target (what actually happened compared to what the company was trying to achieve) Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #performance #bus #company #terms #punctuality #target #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The service of a
bus
 company in terms of arriving on time compared to actual and
target
 between 1999 and 2003 was
illustrate
Wrong verb form
illustrated
show examples
 in these charts
Overall
, in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most of the
years
Add a comma
years,
show examples
 the
bus
 punctuality was below the
target
, and the number of
complain
Replace the word
complaints
show examples
 count
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
gradually increased over the period.
to begin
 with, in 1999, the
bus
 achievement to
serve
Wrong verb form
serving
show examples
 on time stood at 85%, being lower by 1%
from
Change preposition
than
show examples
 the
target
 and the number of
protest
Change to a plural noun
protests
show examples
 was about 70.
it getting
Verb problem
It
show examples
worsen
Wrong verb form
worsened
show examples
 in 2000, the punctuality dropped to 82% when the
target
 was similar
as
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the previous year and
this
 caused
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 rise
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
dissatisfaction to 100.
in
Capitalize word
In
show examples
 addition, the
bus
 performance to arrive as schedule increased to 84.5% in 2001 and the
target
 was 85%, it reduced the complaints to around 80. moving to
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 comparison, in 2002 the
target
 for
bus
Fix the agreement mistake
buses
show examples
arrived
Wrong verb form
arriving
show examples
 on time remained unchanged but the
bus
 performance declined by 1%,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
leads
Wrong verb form
led
show examples
 to the number of
complains
Replace the word
complaints
show examples
 rumped up around 110. After that, in 2003, the
bus
succeded
Correct your spelling
succeeded
show examples
to overcome
Change preposition
in overcoming
show examples
 the
target
 by around 1%.
However
, the passenger dissatisfaction still rose to 120.
Submitted by wildannuraiman on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words bus, target with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Punctuality
  • Performance metrics
  • Actual vs target
  • Discrepancies
  • Trends
  • Improvement
  • Decline
  • Efficiency
  • Operational performance
  • Customer satisfaction
  • Comparative analysis
  • Performance measures
  • Assessment period
  • Timeliness
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