. Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Competition
at
many places Change preposition
in
such
as working place, school, and even in daily life seems t
be an excellent thing. Change preposition
to
However
, many people
argue that collaboration would be better than become
opponents to defeat each other. Change the verb form
becoming
this
essay will discuss both views of this
statement and give the reason why I suppose that competition
will give many positive aspect
to Change to a plural noun
aspects
people
.
May
Correct your spelling
Many
people
believe that cooperation in working, studying, even
in daily life will be better than Correct word choice
and even
competition
. First of all, the reason Add an article
the competition
makes
Verb problem
apply
people
overate working together is that this
skill is becoming prevalent nowadays in any organizations
. Fix the agreement mistake
organization
For example
, many employees in a marketing company would like to work
together to discuss and give more helpful strategies for their advertisement campaigns which seem to be more productive. Secondly
, working in a team could save much time compares
to working alone. The reason is that we can divide Wrong verb form
compared
may
tasks for those Correct your spelling
many
people
, so each individual will have responsibility for their researches
which makes them have to conduct a lot to demonstrate their Fix the agreement mistake
research
work
in front of everyone.
On the other hand
, competition
is
Change the verb form
also gives
also
give some positive meanings to us in various aspects. On top of that, it boost
our motivation to finalize tasks when we Change the verb form
boosts
found
that someone is better than us. It will build a competitive environment involuntarily for those Wrong verb form
find
people
to study or work
more to gain the
higher place which makes them more scholarly in their apartment indirectly. Correct article usage
a
Furthermore
, everyone will accomplish all tasks on their own without any help which build
more confidence and independence. Correct subject-verb agreement
builds
Last
but not least, working lone
helps us understand entire our assignment because we have to research the whole of Correct your spelling
alone
those
information.
In conclusion, both ideas about the advantages of Correct determiner usage
the
competition
and cooperation in society have their own positive. However
, I still believe that competition
at work
, at school, and in daily life is still a good thing.Submitted by chauhongngoc.577 on
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task achievement
Make sure all ideas are clearly expressed. Some sentences are hard to follow due to unclear phrasing.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points. This will make your argument more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Organize paragraphs better to show clear distinctions between ideas and arguments. This could enhance overall clarity and flow.
coherence cohesion
Both introduction and conclusion are present, which helps frame the discussion well.
task achievement
Good attempt at addressing both views as the prompt requires.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.
‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.
Examples:
I really want to study but I’m too tired.
I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.
If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.