In recent times, stress has emerged out to be the major challenge faced by people nowadays. What are the causes of this problem? Suggest some effective solutions for the same.

Transformation

Correct article usage

The transformation

show examples

of lifestyle ,from traditional one to modern style, over the

last

Linking Words

century has had its

side-effects

Correct your spelling

side effects

show examples

. One of the negative aspects is related to

people

Use synonyms

's mental health;

people

Use synonyms

are more prone to experience

stress

Use synonyms

in their daily lives. Pressure in

workplace

Add an article

the workplace

show examples

and widespread stagnant lifestyle are reasons for

this

Linking Words

phenomenon.

Whereas

Linking Words

, it can be alleviated by governments' apt actions.

Firstly

Linking Words

, compared to the past, today,the pace of life is significantly higher , and a huge amount of effort is required to keep up with it. The situation is similar in the

workplaces

Fix the agreement mistake

workplace

show examples

, employees have to do multiple tasks in a short period of time.

Consequently

Linking Words

, doubt

abount

Correct your spelling

about

finishing various missions

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

specified deadlines causes anxiety.

Secondly

Linking Words

, modernity is not only about enhancing convenience in our

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

, but

Change preposition

apply

show examples

automated tools introduced to our lives,

it has

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

resulted in lazy individuals who are unwilling to be active. The more

people

Use synonyms

adapt

Correct your spelling

adopt

show examples

inactive

Correct article usage

an inactive

show examples

lifestyle, the more they will have challenges in doing their jobs.

Therefore

Linking Words

, they would encounter stressful situations.

However

Linking Words

, the reasonable policies taken by authorities can soothe these issues. Regular exercise can reduce

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

stress

Use synonyms

remarkably;

thus

Linking Words

, governments can

promote

Verb problem

encourage

show examples

their citizens to

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

exercise. In Austria, if you use your bike routinely to commute

your

Change preposition

to your

show examples

job, you will be paid 400 Euros

at the end

Linking Words

of the year.

Moreover

Linking Words

, a rigorous

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

law should be settled in order to have limited work hours.

Then

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

can not only do their jobs calmly, but spend more time with their families and friends, which is another factor playing

role

Correct article usage

a role

show examples

in relieving

stress

Use synonyms

Overall

Linking Words

although

Linking Words

obligations to deliver excessive tasks in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

different careers

as well as

Linking Words

sedentary

Correct article usage

a sedentary

show examples

way of living lead to

stress

Use synonyms

to be

Change the verb form

being

show examples

omnipresent in societies, states' appropriate

legislations

Fix the agreement mistake

legislation

show examples

would lessen the problems.

faraisam33

Dec 4, 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

To enhance coherence, try to ensure each paragraph clearly transitions from one idea to the next. Some transitions between ideas could be smoother.

Task Response

Your essay could benefit from more examples when discussing causes and solutions, to strengthen your arguments.

Task Response

While your ideas are generally clear, you could aim to make your argument even more comprehensive with more specific details.

Task Achievement

The essay provides a clear structure with both causes and solutions addressed.

Coherence and Cohesion

The introduction and conclusion effectively encapsulate the main points, strengthening the logical flow of your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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15
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

296 words

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In recent times, stress has emerged out to be the major challenge faced by people nowadays. What are the causes of this problem? Suggest some effective solutions for the same.

Schools are no longer needed because students could find so much information on the Internet and study at home. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. ?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that parents have great influence on children's growth, but others think that influence from the outside plays a more important role. Discuss both test views and give your own opinion.