The greater proportion of government's budget should be allocated to disease prevention and health education because prevention is better than cure. Do you agree or disagree?

#proportion #government #budget #disease #prevention #health #education #cure

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Nowadays, the United Nations (UN) is promoting sustainable development goals in order to achieve equality in every aspect of our lives. Some people argue that the best approach is focusing on

health

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education

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and disease

prevention

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while

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others think that curing is more appropriate. In

this

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essay, I will explain the extent to which both the disadvantages and the advantages.

To begin

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with, developing countries are still facing

health

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issues,

such

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as child and maternal mortality. Governments may need to tackle these issues as soon as possible, as they can lower the population.

Instead

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of making outreach programs, they are concerned about fixing public healthcare facilities or adding more doctors in certain areas. As the problems are handled, they can shift to focus on

prevention

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actions.

On the contrary

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, preventive healthcare reduces long-term costs. Investments in

health

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education

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and disease

prevention

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can significantly lower the expenses of treating diseases in the future.

Furthermore

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this

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will lead to more sustainable

health

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and welfare. As an example, the government allocates the state budgets for doctors'

further

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education

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. In the future, if the doctors had already completed their studies and served the country, they would have helped sick people as well. Turning to another benefit, educating the public about healthy lifestyles helps in reducing the burden on healthcare systems. Effective

education

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can empower and inform individuals to make healthier choices.

Consequently

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this

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can decrease the need for medical interventions.

As a result

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, outreach programs in remote areas can be mediums to inform uneducated people about healthy lifestyles.

Furthermore

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, the rates of morbidity in those areas can be declined. All things considered, I believe that the merits outweigh the demerits.

Prevention

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is still better than cure, as the long-term benefits will help to achieve sustainable development goals.

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task achievement

Ensure your main points are consistently supported with specific examples or evidence to strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly into the next to enhance the flow of ideas, clarifying relationships between them.

coherence cohesion

The essay presents a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

task achievement

It covers both perspectives of the argument, discussing prevention and cure.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

293 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Preventive healthcare
health education
chronic diseases
public health outcomes
life expectancy
empower individuals
medical interventions
economic productivity
sustainable approach
resource allocation
root causes
vaccinations
lifestyle modifications
public health campaigns

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The greater proportion of government's budget should be allocated to disease prevention and health education because prevention is better than cure. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that robots are important for humans’ future development. Other think that robot have negative effects on society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

some people think it id important to construct new buildings rather than wasting money on maintaing old ones.To what extend do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Public library should provide books and not waste their limited resources on expensive high-tech media such as software, applications, videos or DVDs. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease, governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problems. To what extend do you agree or disagree?