The diagram below shows how one type of coal is used to produce electricity. Summarise the information by selectting and reporting the main features, and make comparisions where relevant.

The diagram below shows how one type of coal is used to produce electricity. Summarise the information by selectting and reporting the main features, and make comparisions where relevant.
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The figure illustrates how electricity
produces
Wrong verb form
is produced
show examples
from one type of coal, so There are various steps which will be discussed.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
in the first step a variety amount of coal, which is mined successfully,
transfers
Wrong verb form
is transferred
show examples
to the gasifier by truck, and
then
Linking Words
after persuading some steps,
such
Linking Words
as cooling and cleaning,
finally
Linking Words
electricity
Add a missing verb
is produce
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produce
Replace the word
produced
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. First of all, a variety amount of coal is mined and crushed,
then
Linking Words
it is carried to the factory by truck. It is noticeable that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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Gaz is produced and after cooling in the factory, some waste is divided.
Conversely
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, in the factory gases, which are separated from waste gases produce power plants.
Finally
Linking Words
, excessive amounts of electricity produce dramatically.
As a result
Linking Words
, these amounts of production are used for both factories and residential areas.
Submitted by mahanz on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "finally".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • thermal coal
  • crushed
  • combustion
  • heat energy
  • boil
  • steam
  • turbine
  • generator
  • mechanical energy
  • electrical energy
  • transformers
  • voltage
  • transmitted
  • power lines
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