"Prevention is better than cure". Researching and treating diseases is too costly so it would be better to invest in preventative measures. To what extent do you agree.

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Many civilians say that preventing diseases is a better choice than curing
due to
how
costy
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costly
it can be. I firmly believe that prevention can help in
such
a
way
for example
, when coronavirus started to spread worldwide it became an emergency case ,
few
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and few
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people started to suggest home remedies including doctors
among
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apply
show examples
them
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apply
show examples
.
In addition
, to that being sick can limit normal activities that one can do
such
as walking or as simple as doing your own grocery shopping.
However
,
its
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it's
it is
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tough to prevent all new illnesses because they might have new genetic forms or different ribosomes.
Additionally
,I highly believe that making
an
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apply
show examples
affordable resources for limiting new diseases is
benefical
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beneficial
apply .
Secondly
, why would
preventation
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prevention
be an option if
theres
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there's
there
a
way
to stop any infection from spreading ? I highly suggest working on that .
For example
, using the antibody from the virus and
inject
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injecting
show examples
it in
an
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a
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conversly
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conversely
way
that alarms the body into making more white blood cells , by that the body would be ready for any attack. Mark Richards and Joesph Kelly have done studies on how to use the genome
into
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in
show examples
a helpful
human friendly
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human-friendly
show examples
way
, back in 2003 they recorded 82 studies on
different
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a different
the different
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type
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types
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of
ethinicities
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ethnicities
and races and all came into have the virus genome can provide us
a
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with a
show examples
reason to limit
spread
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the spread
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and attacking our body system.
Finally
, the
ministry
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Ministry
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of
health
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Health
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in each region should all agree
into
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on
show examples
multiple sources of stopping an infection. In conclusion, I believe if we can prevent diseases it can save us a bunch but if we
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can
show examples
cant
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can't
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we should stick
into
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to
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limiting
it
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them
show examples
from spreading
Submitted by dr.hessahaljalahma on

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task achievement
Your response addresses the task, but there are areas where you could deepen your analysis. Clearly define your stance early on and make sure all your points consistently support this position.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your ideas are clearly structured. While you have an introduction and conclusion, the body paragraphs should be more logically organized. Consider using clear topic sentences for each paragraph.
task achievement
You've included relevant examples to support your points, such as the reference to the coronavirus pandemic.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps in framing your argument.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • proactive
  • preventive measures
  • lifestyle diseases
  • public health
  • healthcare expenditure
  • cost-effective
  • chronic conditions
  • early detection
  • immunization
  • health promotion
  • risk factors
  • non-communicable diseases
  • disease surveillance
  • preventive diagnostics
  • health literacy
  • universal healthcare
  • primary prevention
  • secondary prevention
  • tertiary prevention
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