IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

There is too much noise in many public places in cities. What causes this? What can be done to solve the problem?

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There can be no doubt that
noise
Use synonyms
 pollution is a pressing issue that has negatively affected those living in urban areas. The underlying causes of
this
Linking Words
 are inappropriate
noise
Use synonyms
 from construction sites and commercial parties, which can be addressed by the government applying time-based restrictions. Perhaps the major cause of
noise
Use synonyms
 pollution can be traced back to infrastructural
work
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. To explain,
due to
Linking Words
 industrialization, the demand for housing and other amenities increases. To satisfy these requirements, large-scale projects have to be put to
work
Use synonyms
 throughout most of the daytime.
However
Linking Words
, the reliance on heavy machinery contributes to ear-hurting
noise
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, adversely affecting residents'
overall
Linking Words
 quality of life. An additional cause of annoying
noise
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 is commercial
activities
Use synonyms
. To be specific, these
activities
Use synonyms
 include parties, and entertaining performances which are designated with loud sound effects, creating excessive
noise
Use synonyms
 late at night.
As a result
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 can lead to sleep deprivation and disrupt residents' personal lives. To mitigate the issue, one effective approach is that the government should implement time-based
restriction
Fix the agreement mistake
restrictions
show examples
. Simply put, noisy
activities
Use synonyms
 would be forced to operate in specific daytime hours and they
will
Wrong verb form
would
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 get fines when they break the rule, ensuring quieter
morings
Correct your spelling
mornings
 and evenings. In Japan,
contruction
Correct your spelling
construction
work
Use synonyms
 and
night-life
Correct your spelling
nightlife
show examples
activities
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 have regulated closing hours,
maintaning
Correct your spelling
maintaining
 peace in nearby residential
neighborhoods
Change the spelling
neighbourhoods
show examples
. In conclusion,
noise
Use synonyms
 pollution mostly stems from infrastructural
work
Use synonyms
 and
late night
Add a hyphen
late-night
show examples
activities
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the government needs to look at restricting noisy
work
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 appropriate
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
 to give back the inherent peace of the city

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coherence cohesion
Consider using more varied transitional phrases to enhance the logical flow of your arguments.
task achievement
Try to include more specific examples or case studies to illustrate your points further.
task achievement
The essay clearly identifies key causes of noise pollution and proposes a feasible solution.
coherence cohesion
Ideas are presented in a logical order with a clear introduction and conclusion, contributing to the essay's clarity.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains focus on the topic, delivering a coherent line of reasoning throughout.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • noise pollution
  • urbanization
  • population density
  • traffic congestion
  • infrastructure development
  • public announcement systems
  • street performances
  • noise regulations
  • soundproof materials
  • public transportation
  • designated quiet zones
  • green spaces
  • buffer zones
  • public awareness
  • community efforts
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