Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
The
contetious
topics related Correct your spelling
contentious
the
ideal environment at Change preposition
to the
work
, school or in a
daily life Correct article usage
apply
deviding
into two sides. Some individuals believe that Correct your spelling
dividing
competition
should be a good things
, Correct the article-noun agreement
thing
whereas
others
think cooperation would be more better.
The existence of competition
with colleagues could'nt
be avoided in certain places. Some people think Correct your spelling
couldn't
with
the increase Change preposition
apply
of
Change preposition
in
ambitiouns
through Correct your spelling
ambitions
ambitious
competition
it will affect the output of the work
in a positive way. For instance
, if the
sense of Correct article usage
a
competition
between the
peers Correct article usage
apply
exist
, it will boost their Change the verb form
exists
ambitiouns
to earn the highest position Correct your spelling
ambitions
as
possible. It will Change preposition
apply
also
motivate them to always keep their spirit and ambitouns
to become better than anyone.
Correct your spelling
ambitions
ambition
However
, this
phenomenen
Correct your spelling
phenomenon
also
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
the
possible Correct article usage
apply
affects
Replace the word
effects
for
Change preposition
on
the
people in a negative way. Correct article usage
apply
That is
why others
believe that cooperate
is better than competing against each other. Replace the word
cooperation
This
may cause a decrease in the sense of belonging and team
Correct your spelling
teamwork
work
between the peers. As a part of a society or a Fix the agreement mistake
colleague
colleagues
it is important to maintain a good relationship with Add a comma
colleagues,
others
.
In my point of view, it is better to cooperate with each other rather Correct word choice
than to
to
make it Remove the marker
apply
as
a Change preposition
apply
competition
. As a result
of this
, the work
could be done in a perfect outputs
and at the same time we can gain our knowledge through one another. Correct the article-noun agreement
a perfect output
perfect outputs
This
can be beneficial for both of the people. To conclude
, both views has
their own reasons regarding Change the verb form
have
this
topics
, but in my Fix the agreement mistake
topic
opinion
we should keep the relations between Add a comma
opinion,
others
first before anything else.Submitted by salwaputrihardiyan on
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clarity
Work on refining sentence structure and choose precise vocabulary to avoid confusion and ensure clarity. For example, 'Some individuals believe that competition should be a good thing' can be streamlined to enhance clarity.
specificity
Include more specific examples or anecdotes to strengthen your points. For example, mention a specific group or study when discussing the benefits or drawbacks of competition or cooperation.
coherence
To enhance logical flow, consider transitioning between paragraphs more smoothly. For example, “While competition can boost motivation, it also carries risks such as…".
structure
Your essay provides a clear introduction of both views (competition and cooperation) and concludes with your own opinion.
engagement
You recognize and explain multiple perspectives on the topic, which demonstrates an ability to engage with complex issues.
conclusion
The concluding paragraph effectively summarizes your viewpoint and ties back to the introduction, promoting a sense of closure.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?