Some celebrities are famous because of their wealth and glamor. Some people believe they can set a bad example for young people. Do you agree or disagree?

#celebrities #wealth #glamor #people

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Celebrities

often gain immense fame

due to

their

wealth

and affluence, but many argue that they can negatively influence the development of children and the

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

of young

people

.I partially agree with

this

statement, because

while

some

celebrities

inspire and motivate youngsters, others may not be the best role models. On one hand, some

celebrities

can motivate young

people

to pursue their dreams and work hard. Many

celebrities

rise from difficult circumstances to achieve success, and their stories of struggle and determination can serve as an inspiration.

For instance

, many young

people

look up to famous actors or athletes who come from poor backgrounds and now live a life of

wealth

and glamour. These stories teach youngsters the importance of hard work, persistence, and ambition. They can give hope to those who are facing challenges, showing that anything is possible if you put in the effort.

However

on the other hand

, some

celebrities

show bad

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

, which can negatively impact their fans. In some cases, they display a lack of responsibility or good

judgement

Correct your spelling

judgment

show examples

. Many

celebrities

live a lifestyle that encourages materialism, and

this

can create unrealistic expectations for young

people

For example

, a celebrity who frequently

post

Correct subject-verb agreement

posts

show examples

pictures of their expensive possessions or parties might make youngsters believe that

wealth

is the most important thing in life.

Additionally

, some

celebrities

have been involved in scandals or bad actions, setting a negative example for their followers. In conclusion,

while

some

celebrities

can be inspiring role models, others may not be the best influences. Young

people

should be aware of who they admire and try to focus on positive qualities rather than just

wealth

and fame.

Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on Mon Dec 09 2024

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task achievement

Provide a more detailed introduction to set a clearer context for your essay. This could involve a brief mention of the different perspectives on celebrities and their influence.

task achievement

Include more specific examples to strengthen your arguments, particularly in the section discussing negative influences. Examples help demonstrate your points effectively.

coherence cohesion

Try to ensure that the ideas progress in a logically structured manner with clear linking words or phrases for better coherence.

coherence cohesion

The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, framing the argument well.

task achievement

The ideas are mostly clear and the essay presents a balanced view, acknowledging both positive and negative influences of celebrities.

coherence cohesion

Main points are supported adequately, with a good balance between positive and negative aspects.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

275 words

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Some celebrities are famous because of their wealth and glamor. Some people believe they can set a bad example for young people. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some believe that students should begin learning a language very early in school while others think these subjects should be taught later. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

In many countries around the world young people decide to leave their parents’ home once they finish school. They start living on their own or sharing a home with friends. Is this a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include relevant examples

some people find it beneficial to send young children to nursery school before they go to primary school. while others think that it is good to keep them with their family. discuss both views and give your opinion.

In the past , when students did a university degree they tended to study in their own country.Nowadays they have more opportunity to study abroad. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development

Traditional schooling is out of date, boring and stifles natural talents. various professionals have pushed for an educational revolution. Are there alternatives in the educational system. Is traditional education doing more harm than good? Give reasons for your answer.