The diagram below shows the process by which bricks are manufactured for the building industry.

The diagram below shows the process by which bricks are manufactured for the building industry.
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The illustration demonstrates the
complexe
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complex
process and the
mains
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main
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steps of producing bricks which are made for the building industry. First of all, clay, which is the primary component, is dug out.
Next,
Linking Words
it placed on
metal
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the metal
a metal
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grid which
are
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is
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put on a rolling belt and it is mixed with sand and water.
This
Linking Words
composing is either
putting
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put
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in a mould or is cut by a wire to produce bricks.
Secondly
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, they are dried in
a
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an
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oven for 24-48h00.
Furthermore
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, they are heated at moderate and
then
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extremely
hight
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high
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temperature
Fix the agreement mistake
temperatures
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to
finally
Linking Words
be cooled in a special chamber for 2 or 3 days.
Finally
Linking Words
, they are stored together and
then
Linking Words
delivered by truck.
Submitted by leila.dosso on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "finally".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the first paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 1 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the first paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • diagram
  • manufacture
  • bricks
  • building industry
  • process
  • dig
  • prepare
  • clay
  • mold
  • shape
  • dry
  • fire
  • kiln
  • cool
  • package
  • fired
  • overview
  • importance
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