IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

First some people think that it is responsibilities of governments to take care of the environment while other believe that it is responsibility of the citizens discuss both views and give your opinion

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many individuals believe that
governments
Use synonyms
 are responsible for addressing environmental issues by implementing strict regulations to decrease carbon emissions,
while
Linking Words
 others assert that residents should take responsibility for caring for the environment by using sustainable materials.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, I think both the public and the government are equally responsible for improving the environment and providing a good community to live in.
Governments
Use synonyms
 have a significant impact on decreasing the amount of carbon emissions and enhancing the general well-being of society. The environmental ministry is responsible for imposing strict rules, which people are forced to follow;
for instance
Linking Words
, implementing penalties or fines for factory and industrial areas because they often produce a massive chunk of CO2, which can lead to an increase in pollution.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
governments
Use synonyms
 should promote afforestation to improve air quality. By planting a large number of trees and increasing the green areas, the number of carbon will decrease.
Therefore
Linking Words
, the amount of pollution may decline, and the atmosphere will become cleaner.
However
Linking Words
, the public has as much responsibility as the government. People should move toward sustainability.
For example
Linking Words
, buying electric cars rather than traditional ones; these cars are eco-friendly and have less of an effect on the climate.
As a result
Linking Words
, if people purchase these vehicles, the amount of CO2 will fall because these cars do not rely on fuel as a source of energy.
Moreover
Linking Words
, buying second-hand items
also
Linking Words
 fosters sustainability by decreasing the load of waste products that are emitted in manufacturing clothes or other materials. In conclusion, in my opinion, citizens and
governments
Use synonyms
 should share the responsibility to tackle environmental and weather problems.
Governments
Use synonyms
 must implement harsh fines for manufacturers and producers and promote afforestation to mitigate the lot of coal emissions;
whereas
Linking Words
, residents
also
Linking Words
 have a significant impact on improving the climate by relying more on sustainable items.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay structure is clear and each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. While the points were logically structured, the flow between ideas could be slightly improved for enhanced clarity.
task achievement
Your examples are relevant, but could be more specific to strengthen your arguments. Providing more concrete data or studies could enhance the impact of the examples provided.
task achievement
Strive for a more balanced discussion of each view. While both perspectives are discussed, ensuring equal weight in your arguments can provide better balance.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well crafted, providing a clear statement of the writer's position. This demonstrates an ability to frame an argument effectively.
task achievement
The essay covers both perspectives on the topic and includes examples, showing a good level of engagement with the task.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental policies
  • sustainable practices
  • legislation
  • regulation
  • green technologies
  • recycling
  • energy consumption
  • grassroots movements
  • framework
  • incentives
  • conservation efforts
  • significantly
  • collective
  • facilitate
What to do next:
Look at other essays: