Some people suggest that international news should study as a subject in secondary school . However,others say that it will be a waste of valuable school time. Discuss both views and give your opinoin.

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There is a debate between people about how important it is to
providing
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provide
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young people with
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
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related to news.
While
Linking Words
some argue that it will
give
Verb problem
have
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a negative impact on children's leisure time.
This
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essay will explore both perspectives before offering my own opinion. On the one hand , by offering students explore international news it can lead to wide knowledge about numerous things which are happening nowadays.
For instance
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, in New
York
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York,
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it is quite popular
Correct your spelling
between
bewteen
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among
young people to
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task achievement
Ensure that your essay clearly covers both perspectives on the topic. As it stands, the essay doesn't fully explore the side that discusses international news as a waste of school time.
task achievement
Improve the development of ideas with relevant and specific examples to support your points. This will help strengthen your argument and provide depth.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks cohesion in linking ideas smoothly. Use more transitional words and phrases to connect ideas and paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Provide a clear and concise conclusion that summarizes your opinion based on the discussion provided in the essay. This strengthens the overall structure.
introduction conclusion present
You have introduced the topic and stated that the essay will explore both perspectives. This sets a clear direction for the reader.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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