More and more people are relying on their private cars as a major means of transportation. Describe some of the problems over-reliance on cars can cause, and suggest at least one possible solution.
In
this
contemporary era, every individual wants to enjoy freedom in term
of various Fix the agreement mistake
terms
aspect
, Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
mode
of transport is one of Correct word choice
and mode
this
. Private Correct pronoun usage
these
vehicles
are more demanding on the basis of choice. I will elaborate the
Change preposition
on the
affects
of depending more on Replace the word
effects
car
and provide some impactful Fix the agreement mistake
cars
soultions
in subsequent paragraphs.
There are Correct your spelling
solutions
numerious
issues, which will occur on the way of more demand of personal cars. Correct your spelling
numerous
Firstly
, more personal cars can cause traffic congestion. Unfortunaetly
, it leads to noise pollution. Correct your spelling
Unfortunately
Moreover
, Golden-ager
will suffer Fix the agreement mistake
Golden-agers
due to
having more health related
ailments. Add a hyphen
health-related
Apart from
this
, this
trend will create obstacles in family relations. For instance
, Every individual go
for Change the verb form
goes
outing
on weekends to Fix the agreement mistake
outings
kill
their spare time with friends and family. If Verb problem
spend
few
Correct article usage
a few
individual
Change to a plural noun
individuals
are having
different plans Wrong verb form
have
then
they would definitely go with their choice as they dont
need to depend on others for Correct your spelling
don't
going
outdoor activities.
Verb problem
apply
Further more
, Correct your spelling
Furthermore
this
modern trend give
rise to Change the verb form
gives
fatiqueness
in Correct your spelling
uniqueness
younger
generation. More reliance on self-owned Add an article
the younger
vehicles
does not teach them the required enthusiam
to reach at workplace with public transport. Correct your spelling
enthusiasm
Unfortanaely
, Correct your spelling
Unfortunately
this
will make them lazy due to
easy
Correct article usage
the easy
conveneince
Correct your spelling
convenience
to
Change preposition
at
workplace
Add an article
the workplace
as well as
other places.
For example
, Using public transport like bus
and Fix the agreement mistake
buses
train
requires more Fix the agreement mistake
trains
efforts
as they need to wake up early and have to walk to the stations. Fix the agreement mistake
effort
However
, own
Wrong verb form
owning
vehicles
will ultimately reduce some physical movement in their daily routine.
Each phenomenon has its own pros and cons. Government attention can tackle many problem
with adequate actions. They can increase the interest rate on brand new cars and Change to a plural noun
problems
lowers
the bus fares. Correct your spelling
lower
As a result
, individuals will hesitate to incur such
expenses . It does not solely benefit the governement
with more bus preference Correct your spelling
government
of
public Change preposition
for
vehicles
but, people can save such
money for future use.
In conclusion, private Correct your spelling
much
vehicles
come with myriad advanatges
Correct your spelling
advantages
where
some problem comes Correct word choice
but
alongwith
.
Correct your spelling
along with
This
trend can promote more
nuclear Add an article
the more
family
as Fix the agreement mistake
families
individual
starts enjoying the taste of liberty.Add an article
an individual
the individual
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coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical flow of ideas by organizing paragraphs to follow a clear progression and ensure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Currently, the essay lacks optimum coherence.
task achievement
Work on giving more specific examples and expand more on the points given. The examples should directly relate to the points being discussed.
task achievement
Try to handle one issue per paragraph alongside its solution to enhance clarity and focused responses. It will help make the essay more cohesive and easier to follow.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly outlines the intent to describe problems and suggest solutions.
task achievement
Efforts to provide solutions to the problems discussed, such as government action on interest rates and bus fares, show awareness of possible interventions.
coherence cohesion
The essay successfully touches on multiple issues related to over-reliance on cars, such as traffic congestion, noise pollution, and changes in social dynamics.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.