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Band 5.5

The table and pie charts below show the number of research students in Australian universities in 2001 and 2010.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table and pie charts below show the number of research students in Australian universities in 2001 and 2010.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #research #students #australian #universities #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The table illustrates the
population
Use synonyms
 of
students
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 local and non-local enrolled in research
program
Fix the agreement mistake
programs
show examples
 in Australian universities, categorized by gender in
a pie charts
Correct the article-noun agreement
a pie chart
pie charts
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 in two separate years 2001 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that there was an increase in the enrollment of the
students
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 majoring
research
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in research
show examples
 in 2010. The
population
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 of local research
students
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 had the highest figure, especially the male.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the international female had the lowest enrollees.
At
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In
show examples
 the beginning, the
population
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 of local
students
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 was 33, 657 (87%), where 44%
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 male and 43%
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
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 female.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the average enrollees of international
students
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 was only
at
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apply
show examples
13%, which was equivalent to 5,192. Looking more at the graph, there was a decline in the proportion of local
students
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 in 2010;
however
Linking Words
, the total
population
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 managed to
climbed
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climb
show examples
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 54, 081. Meanwhile, the local male experienced a decline of 6% (38%),
while
Linking Words
 the female 8% (35%).
In contrast
Linking Words
,
with
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apply
show examples
the number of international
students
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, rose to 27% (14, 593) in 2010
Submitted by roycelparaiso on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words population, students with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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