IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The diagram below shows how geothermal energy is used to produce electricity

The diagram below shows how geothermal energy is used to produce electricity
#energy #electricity
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This
Linking Words
 linear diagram illustrates
Use synonyms
stages
Correct article usage
the stages
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 of using geothermal energy to produce
electricity
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, which
converted
Wrong verb form
converts
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 cold
water
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 to
electricity
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.
Overall
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,
this
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 diagram has five
stages
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.
Begining
Verb problem
It begins
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 with pumping down the cold
water
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 and
ending
Wrong verb form
ends
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in
Change preposition
with
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powered
Correct article usage
a powered
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 generator by
turbine
Add an article
the turbine
a turbine
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 to produce
electricity
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.
To begin
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, there is a storage of cold
water
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 and
this
Linking Words
 cold
water
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pumped
Add a missing verb
is pumped
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 4.5 km down from the surface.
Then
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 cold
water
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injected
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is injected
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to
Change preposition
into
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 the geothermal zone which
is consist
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consists
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 of hot rocks and that makes
change
Add an article
a change
the change
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 in
water
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 temperature which
turn
Correct subject-verb agreement
turns
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 it
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
 hot
water
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.
Continiuesly
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Continuously
, hot
water
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pumped
Add a missing verb
is pumped
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 up from
depth
Correct article usage
the depth
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 of the earth to the surface. After that,
this
Linking Words
water
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 became steam by using
Add an article
a
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condenser.
Furthermore
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, the steam makes
turbine
Correct article usage
the turbine
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to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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rotate and
this
Linking Words
 rotation
caused
Wrong verb form
causes
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power
Correct article usage
the power
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for
Change preposition
of
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generator
Add an article
the generator
a generator
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 to produce
electricity
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. All in all, the diagram shows the
stages
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 of using geothermal energy to produce
electricity
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. It is noticeable that two
stages
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 of
this
Linking Words
 process
Correct your spelling
happened
happens
happend
Correct your spelling
happened
 under the ground and others on the ground
Submitted by Mahshad on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words stages, electricity, water with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 3 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • geothermal energy
  • generate electricity
  • diagram
  • volcano
  • magma reservoirs
  • deep underground
  • heat
  • steam
  • geothermal plant
  • turbine
  • condensed
  • pumped back
  • underground reservoirs
  • transmitted
  • power grid
  • distribution
  • continuous
  • renewable
  • volcanic activity
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