IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

All the people in a company should be treated equally and provide with the same number of holidays in a year or people doing different jobs enjoy different amounts of holiday time. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

#people #company #holidays #year #jobs #amounts #holiday #time
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The importance of
holidays
 in
worplaces
Correct your spelling
workplaces
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 been a topic of different
discusions
Correct your spelling
discussions
 nowadays. Many people agree that
leasure
Correct your spelling
leisure
days
 should be equal for
everyone
, without
take
Change the form of the verb
taking
show examples
in
Change preposition
into
show examples
 account employment activities.
However
, there are others who consider vacations ought to be granted depending
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the role that folks are performing in society.
This
 essay will explain the two perspectives and why I support the
later
Correct your spelling
latter
show examples
 option since some jobs require different work conditions.
To begin
 with the former statement about having
everyone
 the same
days-off
Correct your spelling
days off
show examples
 as equal. It is
importan
Correct your spelling
important
 to highlight that the National Work Rights point out that all employees are entitled to have
certain
Correct article usage
a certain
show examples
 number
or
Correct your spelling
of
show examples
days
 per year and It is mandatory for
everyone
 to take them.
This
 is not only for the mental health of the workers,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 is very important, but to give employees the
oportunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 to spend time with their families and recover from all the
days
 they have been under the pressure that any job could cause them.
On the other hand
, there are people who advocate the idea of having
holidays
according to
 the occupation. It is an option that
merit
Change the verb form
merits
show examples
to be considered
Wrong verb form
consideration
show examples
due to
Change preposition
because
show examples
 not all the jobs have the same physical or mental cost.
In particular
 careers in health areas,
such
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 nurses, doctors or
psicologist
Correct your spelling
psychologists
psychologist
 have a big mental toll,
in other words
, these jobs involve
high stress
Add a hyphen
high-stress
show examples
 levels,
axiety
Correct your spelling
anxiety
 and overwhelming that need to
being
Change the verb
be
show examples
releas
Correct your spelling
released
release
 in order to provide
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good performance during their shifts.
Therefore
, I encourage the alternative of
give to
Wrong verb form
giving
show examples
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
 of
employments
Correct your spelling
employees
show examples
 the benefit
to enjoy
Change preposition
of enjoying
show examples
more long
Correct word choice
longer
show examples
 periods of
leasure
Correct your spelling
leisure
days
 as it is
benefic
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
 for
everyone
 who
require
Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
show examples
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 services at least once in their
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives
show examples
.
To conclude
, the
holidays
 are part of the rights that all
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
show examples
 must have.
Either if some
Correct word choice
Some
show examples
 people support the choice of
recibe
Correct your spelling
receiving
 equal
holidays
 or if some should have more
days
 off, as doctors or nurses. It is vital to understand that some
employments
Correct your spelling
employees
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have more interaction with humans and it is
everybody
Change noun form
everybody's
show examples
resposability
Correct your spelling
responsibility
 to give them a good rest.
Submitted by osonava on

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grammar
Improve grammatical accuracy by checking for subject-verb agreement and sentence structure. For example, replace 'have been a topic of different discusions' with 'is a topic of significant discussion.'
vocabulary
Work on vocabulary. Use more precise terms—for instance, instead of 'leasure days,' consider 'leave days' or 'holiday entitlement.'
spelling
Ensure spelling accuracy, such as changing 'oportunity' to 'opportunity' and 'resposability' to 'responsibility.'
content
The essay provides a balanced view by discussing both perspectives on the issue, which strengthens the argument and showcases critical thinking.
structure
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, framing the discussion effectively and providing a sense of closure.
examples
The use of specific examples, such as mentioning healthcare professionals, enhances the strength of your argument by making it relatable.
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