IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that success is the best measure for intelligence, while others think that intelligence can be measured in other ways. What is your opinion?

#people #success #measure #intelligence
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For
some
Add a comma
some,
show examples
 they thought if you are successful in
life
 it means having a higher
intelligence
 quotient. But there is a deeper meaning when it comes to
intelligence
 and how people use it in
every day
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everyday
show examples
life
. In
this
 essay, I will discuss the topic and explain my suggestions.
First,
in
reality
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reality,
show examples
 when we see an individual succeeding in their career we think immediately that they are smart.
Therefore
, some of us lose
the
Correct article usage
apply
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self-confidence and begin to think being intelligent is the only reason to get good things in
life
.
For instance
, to be a certified
Engineers
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engineer
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, Nurse or
Doctors
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Doctor
show examples
 it's important to pass the board exam. The preparation
need
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needs
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 there is to study hard.
Which we
Correct pronoun usage
We
show examples
 can say that kind of
things
Fix the agreement mistake
thing
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 goes
to
Change preposition
into
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 the category of Logical
Intelligence
. And every person
have
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has
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different
Add an article
a different
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 level of
Intelligence
.
On the contrary
, there are many ways to measure
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
intelligence
, not only in
logical
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logic
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. In
every
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
day
Correct your spelling
everyday
show examples
life
 of a person, how to survive and
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
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cope
in
Change preposition
with
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 all situations in
life
 is another form of
Intelligence
.
In addition
 to that, being clever and resourceful can be called being smart.
For example
, Bill Gates didn't finish his studies at Harvard, he just continued his passion and that passion made him, who he was today.
To conclude
, I believe there are a lot of ways to achieve dreams.
Also
, being successful doesn't mean, just being smart. To be open minded, putting
effort
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in effort
show examples
, willing to learn and having
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
 outlook in
life
 can make a way to success.
Submitted by chesleykerserarellano on

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task achievement
Try to develop your ideas more fully to provide a complete response to the question. Offering more specific examples and explanations would strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
Enhance the logical flow of your arguments. Make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, ensuring your points are more clearly connected.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a good framework for the reader to understand your main points.
task achievement
You present a balanced view of the topic by discussing different perspectives on intelligence and success.
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