IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#two #maps #show #road #access #city #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The two
diagram
Change to a plural noun
diagrams
show examples
 compare the construction of roads and facilities around a
city
 hospital in 2007 and in 2010.
Overall
, it is evident that the shape of the roads
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 been upgraded.
Besides
, the construction of transportation sectors had become more precise because of the diversion of people and the functional zoning. In terms of the
road
 situation, with the retaining of Ring
Road
 around the
city
 hospital and the outer
City
Road
 in 2007, the new layout
improve
Wrong verb form
improved
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 the Hospital
Road
 by converting the crossroads at the north and south sides, which connect
City
Road
 and Round
Road
, into a roundabout. In 2007, there were 3 bus stops on each side of Hospital
Road
,
while
 in 2010, they were incorporated into a large bus station, placed
in
Change preposition
apply
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west of
original
Add an article
the original
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road
. The two roundabouts extended a new
road
 from the southwest and northwest to connect
new
Correct article usage
a new
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 one.
Furthermore
, the former car park for both staff and
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
located
Add a missing verb
is located
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in
Change preposition
on
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 the east side of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Hospital
Road
,
however
, it is now staff-only. To find the public parking lot, we need to turn right at the second roundabout and
then
 turn left.
Submitted by fiasngs on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words city, road with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic flow
  • road access
  • ring road
  • bus stops
  • bus station
  • congestion
  • parking facilities
  • pedestrian crossings
  • vehicular flow
  • organizational structure
  • accessibility
  • enhancements
  • configuration
  • dedicated
  • diverting traffic
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