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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#show #percentage #water #purposes #six #areas #world #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The pie chart illustrates the proportion of
water
Use synonyms
 consumption being used for six different continents in the world.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that most of the
water
Use synonyms
used
Add a missing verb
is used
show examples
 for agricultural activities in almost every continent
given
Verb problem
apply
show examples
.
Conversely
Linking Words
, domestic consumption was the lowest. On the one hand, Africa, Central Asia and South East Asia,
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
used their maximum amount of
water
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 agricultural purposes around (84%, 88% and 81% respectively).
While
Linking Words
, they used
minimum
Add an article
the minimum
a minimum
show examples
 amount of
water
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 industrial applications and domestic
use
Use synonyms
 approximately, 5-12%
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 industrial
use
Use synonyms
 and 7-9%
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 everyday
use
Use synonyms
. 5%
use
Use synonyms
 of domestic applications consumed the lowest amount of
water
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, in Central Asia domestic applications accounted for just 5% of
water
Use synonyms
 consumption, which
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
 lowest among all uses
On the other hand
Linking Words
, North America and Europe used the majority of the
water
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 their manufacturing
use
Use synonyms
 nearly (48% and 53% separately).
However
Linking Words
, South Africa used a large proportion of
water
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 agricultural
use
Use synonyms
, 19%
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 domestic
use
Use synonyms
, and
lastly
Linking Words
 10%
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 industrial
use
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by AL NURE FOYZUR REZA SUPRIO on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words water, use with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • water consumption
  • agricultural, industrial, domestic
  • usage patterns
  • developed vs developing regions
  • irrigation systems
  • climate factors
  • percentage breakdown
  • water management
  • sustainability
  • residential water use
  • efficiency
  • charts comparison
  • water-intensive
  • water scarcity
  • resource allocation
  • desalination
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