IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some sports are considered extremely dangerous, but many people still like them. Why do people take part in dangerous sports? Give some suggestions on how to deal with these dangers

#sports #people #part #suggestions #dangers
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Nowadays, it
is becomes
Change the verb form
is becoming
show examples
 more and more common for
people
Use synonyms
 who have a passion
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
Use synonyms
Correct article usage
the sport
show examples
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
filed
Correct your spelling
field
show examples
 to
Add a missing verb
be oppsesed
show examples
oppsesed
Correct your spelling
obsessed
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 dangerous
sports
Use synonyms
wich
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
 consider to include a huge
amunet
Correct your spelling
amount
 of risks for those
members
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will down to the reasons for
this
Linking Words
 issue and recommend some suggestions to reduce the amount of risks. To
startd
Correct your spelling
start
started
 with the idea that these days the number of
people
Use synonyms
 who
interested
Add a missing verb
are interested
show examples
 in dangerous
sports
Use synonyms
had
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
increaced
Correct your spelling
increased
 more than before.
Although
Linking Words
 those
sportd
Correct your spelling
sports
sport
sported
 can cause a lot of
risk
Change to a plural noun
risks
show examples
,
members
Use synonyms
 still
doing
Wrong verb form
do
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
, and that would
happend
Correct your spelling
happen
happened
 for so many reasons
such
Linking Words
 as: those
sports
Use synonyms
 bring
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
members
Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 feeling of joy and
also
Linking Words
 give them an
oppertunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 to have an
advunture
Correct your spelling
advantage
 in
them
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 lives.
Moreover
Linking Words
, by doing those
sports
Use synonyms
 the amount of dopamine in
humen
Correct your spelling
human
 blood, which
known
Add a missing verb
is known
show examples
 as a
hormine
Correct your spelling
hormone
 of
happines
Correct your spelling
happiness
, will slightly
increace
Correct your spelling
increase
. Moving forward
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
mention some suggestions, which
people
Use synonyms
 can do, to avoid
this
Linking Words
 issue. Starting from the idea that
people
Use synonyms
, who want to do those
Use synonyms
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
 should apply
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 an official trainer about the
the
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
sport
Use synonyms
 which they consider
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
do before
do
Wrong verb form
doing
show examples
 it that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because the trainer will teach them the correct ways of doing the
sport
Use synonyms
, so the amount of
injuerd
Correct your spelling
injured
 risk will
decreace
Correct your spelling
decrease
.
In addition
Linking Words
, some
sports
Use synonyms
 like mountaineering require
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
official clothes which
members
Use synonyms
 must
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
wear, but
on the other
Linking Words
hand
Add a comma
hand,
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 sometimes they ignore
to wear
Change the verb form
wearing
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
, so to solve
this
Linking Words
 problem the government must
creat
Correct your spelling
create
show examples
 a
low
Correct your spelling
law
show examples
of
Change preposition
about
show examples
 that. In conclusion,
dispite
Correct your spelling
despite
people
Use synonyms
 having
differsnet
Correct your spelling
different
 views. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
 I consider that doing dangerous
sports
Use synonyms
 need to know all the ways of
avoinding
Correct your spelling
avoiding
 risk before
people
Use synonyms
 do it.
Submitted by mrglzy1 on

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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