People today are not as fit as they were in the past. What are the causes of this? What can governments do to deal with this issue?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The rise in physical and mental ailments is one of the major issues nowadays. The individuals of the present times are not as healthy as

people

Use synonyms

of the past times.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss the potential causes and will explain the initiatives, the higher authorities can take to tackle

this

Linking Words

issue. There are several causes of

this

Linking Words

problem. The first and foremost

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

is the

sedentery

Correct your spelling

sedentary

lifestyle. Life with technology has become a lot easier which promotes inactivity in a person's life. Machines at home and work perform plenty of tasks which is the main cause of

unhealthy

Correct article usage

an unhealthy

show examples

lifestyle. The other one is

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

fast

food

Use synonyms

and

alcohal

Correct your spelling

alcohol

consumption in

the

Correct article usage

show examples

significant amount. The facility

of ordering

Change preposition

to order

show examples

food

Use synonyms

and liquor online has increased the demand on

the

Correct article usage

show examples

major level

whereas

Linking Words

the availability of unhealthy

diet

Fix the agreement mistake

diets

show examples

is putting

people

Use synonyms

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

at risk.

For example

Linking Words

, if a person eats fast

food

Use synonyms

and has a

sedentery

Correct your spelling

sedentary

lifestyle,

however

Linking Words

, it will have dire consequences on the person's health. There are various policies, governments can make to help those, suffering

health

Change preposition

from health

show examples

issues. By spreading awareness,

this

Linking Words

issue can be resolved. The

govrenment

Correct your spelling

government

should hire influential

people

Use synonyms

to promote activities

such

Linking Words

excercise

Correct your spelling

exercise

and yoga.

For instance

Linking Words

, famous

people

Use synonyms

have

immense

Add an article

an immense

show examples

fan following,

the

Correct word choice

and the

show examples

promotion of

these kind

Change the determiner

this kind

these kinds

show examples

of activities can be profoundly helpful for many

people

Use synonyms

Furthermore

Linking Words

, heavy

tax

Fix the agreement mistake

taxes

show examples

on unhealthy

food

Use synonyms

items should be inflicted.

This

Linking Words

would create a massive difference. Imposing high tax will not only reduce the consumption of

bevereges

Correct your spelling

beverages

and unhealthy

food

Use synonyms

but will contribute to better living standards. In conclusion,

people

Use synonyms

in the past did not

had

Change the verb form

have

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

easy access to these amenities, which in turn not

had

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

any negative impacts on their lives.

With

Change preposition

show examples

taking these initiatives, these hazards can be avoided to

large

Correct article usage

a large

show examples

extent.

Submitted by georgeanum650 on Mon Dec 16 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Topic: some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play\ with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the children of having a large number of toys?
Some parents prefer to buy lots of toys for their children. This trend can be both fruitful and harmful for them.While they are trying to present lots of options to their children, they will face addicted persons who have infinitive requests in the future.
5
band
Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects. But others believe that should focus on subjects that they are good at or that they find the most interest discuss both side and give your opinion.
Nowadays, young adults receive many kinds of subjects while learning at the schools. However, some people argue that the students only need to concentrate on subject they particularly find interesting or good at it. I would argue that teenagers should learn all subjects that are given at schools in order to know the basic knowledge that will be useful for their daily lives. They can focus on certain subjects when they take an undergraduate school.
4
band
some children spend hours every on smartphones. Why is this case? Is it a positive or negative development?
In the modern era, technological advancements, especially smartphones, have become an intergral part in our lives. There are numerous reasons why children spend a majority of their lifetime using these high-tech gadgets such as the attractive contents comprised inside them as well as the paucity of parental care towards their kids. From the writer's experience, I think this trend lead to a detrimental impact on their health also social lives.
9
band
Task 2 ; --- Childhood obesity is an increasing problem in Australia as many as two thirds of children are now obese. Schools have a responsibility to monitor what their students eat and the amount of exercise they do. To what extend do you agree to this statement?
Childhood obesity is becoming increasingly prevalent in Australia, with nearly two-thirds of children now categorized as obese. It has been argued that educational institutions should be held responsible for monitoring students' diets and physical activity. While I agree that they play a vital role, I believe this responsibility should be shared with families and society as a whole.
7.5
band
These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
In the contemporary world, human interaction has significantly changed with the advent of cellular phones and networking. One can opine that this change has more pros than cons and the reasons are highlighted below.

People today are not as fit as they were in the past. What are the causes of this? What can governments do to deal with this issue?

Topic: some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play\ with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the children of having a large number of toys?

Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects. But others believe that should focus on subjects that they are good at or that they find the most interest discuss both side and give your opinion.

some children spend hours every on smartphones. Why is this case? Is it a positive or negative development?

Task 2 ; --- Childhood obesity is an increasing problem in Australia as many as two thirds of children are now obese. Schools have a responsibility to monitor what their students eat and the amount of exercise they do. To what extend do you agree to this statement?

These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?