IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that the increased use of technology in education is beneficial, while others argue that it can have negative effects. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #technology #education #effects
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In today's world,
technology
 has revolutionized many aspects of our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
 including education. It is widely debated whether it benefits the learning process
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 or makes it worse. In
this
 essay, I will explore both perspectives and explain why I think it is a positive development.
To begin
 with, some people argue that it might create reliance on advanced
technology
, which can make them forget about basic
skills
such
 as spelling.
Also
, the lack of face-to-face interaction could worsen their social
skills
, especially for children who need to develop social
skills
 by interacting with their peers.
On the other hand
, many individuals believe that the
implemnt
Correct your spelling
implement
 of
technology
 in education programs has helped a lot of students who live in rural areas and made it affordable for them to access great quality classes without the need to travel. On top of that, online courses
allows
Change the verb form
allow
show examples
 them to learn at their own pace. I believe that
this
 approach,
in particular
, would increase productivity and efficiency.
To sum up
,
Although
technology
 might have some drawbacks like decreasing students' attention span and creating a gap in their social
skills
, I think it enhances the process of education by making it accessible to many students living far away and learning
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 their own speed.
Submitted by abanmirahaf on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: