People are surrounded by many kinds of advertising which can influence their life. Do the positive effects of this trend outweigh negative effects?

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The
world
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is
overload
Wrong verb form
overloaded

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb overload. Consider changing it.

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by advertising,
the
Correct word choice
and the

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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booming growth
of
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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is a result of
technological
Correct article usage
the technological

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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explosion, businesses can use social
media
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

platforms or
media
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

channels to promote their products, services or messages effectively.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

trend can have
positive
Add an article
a positive

The noun phrase positive and negative impact seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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and negative impact on our life. To be fair, advertising brings lots of positive influences to
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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society, it manages to deliver the information of updating items to potential customers, so people are in
a
Change the article
an

The article a may be incorrect. Consider changing it to agree with the beginning sound of the following word easier.

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easier situation now to choose their
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite

The spelling of favorite is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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goods than
the
Change preposition
in the

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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past.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
advertisement
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

reflects a changing
world
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, surrounding by many kinds of commercials means we are able to update news, modern technological
advancement
Fix the agreement mistake
advancements

It seems that advancement may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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or even political events in a fast-growing
world
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
In contrast
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
advertisement
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

possibly fails to offer beneficial effects to humanity in the long term because we merely have a small proportion of demands to purchase products, which
being
Change the form of the verb
is

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb being. Consider changing it.

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introduced on television or social
media
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, if people are overwhelmed by advertising
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content

It seems that contents may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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, it will significantly waste
us
Change the pronoun
our

It appears that the personal pronoun us should be in the possessive form. Consider changing it.

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time,
Linking Words
Linking Words
instead
Add a comma
instead,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase instead. Consider adding a comma.

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we should utilize our precious time watch television shows or read books to have more knowledgeable benefits.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, various kinds of
advertisement
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

don’t secure the quality. Many commercials contain toxic
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content

It seems that contents may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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and misinformation occasionally. These negative
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects

It seems that effect may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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can lead to serious consequences
to
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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people’s awareness, especially
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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children. As a matter of fact,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
advertisement
Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements

It seems that advertisement may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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still play an important role in the modern
world
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

trend has a promising potential to bring more advantages rather than advantages to humanity as the future process of
global
Add an article
the global

The noun phrase global economy seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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economy needs to spread information or knowledge and advertising programs can provide efficient
transmition
Correct your spelling
transmission

If you don’t want transmition to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

for it. Living in an era of mass
media
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

helps us to have more chances and benefits.
Nevertheless
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
advertising
Correct article usage
the advertising

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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explosion can cause some terrible influences we never expected or projected.
Consequently
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, we should take action to make sure that the positive side of it still outweighs the negative side.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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