IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with prediction from 2030 adn 2040.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population in four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with prediction from 2030 adn 2040.
#information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #prediction #adn
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The line graph shows the information related
the
Change preposition
to the
show examples
number
 of the population in four South East Asian countries living in cities between 1970 to 2020,
along with
 the prediction for 2030 and 2040.
Overall
, all of the ethnicities
shows
Change the verb form
show
show examples
 an upward trend over the years with
Malaysian
Replace the word
Malaysians
show examples
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 the highest, whilst Thai
people
become
Wrong verb form
becoming
show examples
 the
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
.
Malaysian
Replace the word
Malaysians
show examples
become
Wrong verb form
became
show examples
 the ethnicity with the highest increase, starting from 30% in 1970
then
 gradually
rose
Wrong verb form
rising
show examples
 throughout the years until it is predicted to reach its peak of 80% in 2040.
Similarly
, the
number
 of
people
 from
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
also
 started from 30% in 1970. The
number
then
 climbed to nearly 50% in 1990 before it slowly fell to around 40% in 2010 and
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 minimally until over 50% in 2040.
In contrast
, the
number
 of Thai
people
 and
Indonesian
Fix the agreement mistake
Indonesians
show examples
 started from less than 20%. The population of Thai
people
then
 rose significantly to 30% in 1990 and remained stable until 2020. It is predicted that the
number
 will continue to rise rapidly until
reach
Correct subject-verb agreement
reaches
show examples
 its peak of around 50% in 2040.
On the other hand
, immigrants from Indonesia
shows
Correct subject-verb agreement
show
show examples
 a significant increase over the years and the
number
 will continue to rise dramatically until around 60% in 2040.
Submitted by salwaputrihardiyan on

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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