IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Caring for children is probably the most important job in any society. Because of this, all mothers and fathers should be required to take a course that prepares them to be good parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?

#children #job #society #mothers #fathers #course #parents
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is argued that the most vital job in any community is probably to care about
children
. Duo to
this
, All
parents
 should be needed to take some
classes
 that make them ready to be good at parenting.
This
 essay strongly agrees with
this
 statement because it makes them aware of the challenges in the journey,
also
 it would be good for
children
's health. By contributing to educational courses, future
parents
 will gain the knowledge
that is
 required to raise a child.
In addition
, They will become familiar with difficulties they might face, during these lessons. With the help of experts and professionals, mothers and fathers will become well-prepared to manage parenthood and raise exceptional
children
, as they are essential members of society. A recent study found that over sixty
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
parents
 who participated in parenting
classes
 have shown better action in dealing with
children
, As they were more confident than others. One of the most noticeable results of these courses is the sons' and daughters' health, particularly their mental health. By attending
such
classes
,
parents
 learn how to respond to their
children
's needs and how to react to their emotions at various ages. Recent research on
this
 matter concluded that most of the adults, struggling with different kinds of traumas, had uneducated
parents
 throughout their childhood. In conclusion,
this
 essay affirms that the most essential task in every society is caring for
children
, and because of
this
parents
 should attend educational
classes
. In
this
 way, they become aware of what they should expect and
this
 awareness is vital for
children
 well well-being.
Submitted by faranakasadzadian on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: