Some people believe teenagers should focus on all subjects equally, whereas other people think that they should concentrate on only those subjects that they find interesting. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Following the course of
time
, Use synonyms
education
itself has witnessed numerous Use synonyms
changes
to Use synonyms
their
system in order to maintain compatibility with a constantly developing Correct pronoun usage
its
society
. Use synonyms
However
, a debate has come to be as some people Linking Words
are in
Verb problem
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
belief
that Replace the word
believe
students
ought to evenly distribute their Use synonyms
time
to all Use synonyms
subjects
, Use synonyms
while
others recommend concentrating on preferred Linking Words
subjects
. The following essay will discuss both views before my opinion is stated.
The Use synonyms
approach
of focusing on every subject in the Use synonyms
curriculum
provides a sustainable academic path. Evenly investing their Use synonyms
time
into all Use synonyms
subjects
enables a Use synonyms
student
to have a better grasp of every subject’s Use synonyms
knowledge
in order to have a higher variety of career options. Use synonyms
Moreover
, Linking Words
this
Linking Words
approach
allows sustainability, ensuring a Use synonyms
student
can have stronger Use synonyms
knowledge
foundations Use synonyms
while
bettering their understanding and preference of Linking Words
subjects
for improved insights into their future choices. Use synonyms
Finally
, Linking Words
this
gives Linking Words
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
students
more methods for assessment in university enrollment. Use synonyms
For instance
, the previous Linking Words
education
system in Vietnam had an all-compassing Use synonyms
curriculum
, having Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
study
all Use synonyms
subjects
. Use synonyms
This
previous Linking Words
approach
benefitted many Use synonyms
students
, allowing them to Use synonyms
have
more diverse decisions in their Verb problem
make
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
while
ensuring they have sufficient Linking Words
knowledge
to better assist them in making a decision. All in all, focusing evenly on all Use synonyms
subjects
provides stability in a Use synonyms
student
’s academic path Use synonyms
while
allowing a more diverse series of admission forms.
Meanwhile, the concentration on individually preferred Linking Words
subjects
allows Use synonyms
students
to optimize their studies for higher performance. When permitting Use synonyms
students
to Use synonyms
study
Use synonyms
subjects
that they only want to, a positive mindset to Use synonyms
education
for a Use synonyms
student
is formed as they are able to invest Use synonyms
further
into Linking Words
subjects
they enjoy. Use synonyms
Consequently
, Linking Words
this
could enhance their Linking Words
overall
grades with the accentuation of performance to ensure they have better opportunities Linking Words
of entering
their desired universities and courses. More importantly, Change preposition
to enter
this
eliminates the pressure of studying for unwanted Linking Words
subjects
, be that Use synonyms
subjects
they perform poorly at and Use synonyms
overall
optimizes the Linking Words
time
spent Use synonyms
into
studying. Observing recent Change preposition
apply
changes
in Vietnam’s Use synonyms
education
system, it is noticeable that Use synonyms
students
are now allowed to customize their very own Use synonyms
curriculum
with the freedom to eliminate any Use synonyms
subjects
they do not wish to Use synonyms
study
. These Use synonyms
changes
have provided positive results as Use synonyms
students
now have more Use synonyms
time
to Use synonyms
study
Use synonyms
subjects
they enjoy, Use synonyms
therefore
improving their grades and Linking Words
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
for
the fixed syllabus. Change preposition
of
Overall
, letting Linking Words
students
concentrate on Use synonyms
subjects
they find interesting will optimize their Use synonyms
study
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
while
producing positive outcomes with these Linking Words
changes
.
Personally, I Use synonyms
am in
Verb problem
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
belief
that the latter option is more compatible Replace the word
believe
to
the current Change preposition
with
society
. It is evident that the amount of Use synonyms
knowledge
Use synonyms
students
learn Use synonyms
are
much more advanced with a bigger load in accordance Correct subject-verb agreement
is
to
the rapid advancement of Change preposition
with
society
, Use synonyms
As a result
, studying every subject would potentially overload a Linking Words
student
, leading to emotional distress and diminished efficiency. Use synonyms
Therefore
, I support the Linking Words
approach
of allowing personalization in a syllabus to improve grades and the learning experience. Use synonyms
Moreover
, the issue of lacking diversity in options can be handled by letting Linking Words
students
have a clear orientation of what they wish to pursue and follow that fixed path to maintain stability and sustainability.
In conclusion, both approaches to Use synonyms
education
have merits unique to their very own nature. Use synonyms
However
, I personally support the customization of a Linking Words
curriculum
Use synonyms
due to
its suitability to the nature of a Linking Words
society
Use synonyms
that is
moving apace Linking Words
while
ensuring a sufficient learning experience beneficial to the Linking Words
students
Use synonyms
while
compatible with today’s demands.Linking Words
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language accuracy
Ensure consistency in singular/plural forms and pronouns ('education itself has witnessed numerous changes to their system' should be 'its system').
coherence and cohesion
While the essay is well-structured, the transitions between paragraphs can be a little more fluid for improved cohesion.
structure
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, which effectively frame the discussion and the author's viewpoint.
task response
Each viewpoint is well-supported with relevant examples, adding depth to the argument.
task response
Demonstrates a good understanding of the task, addressing both views and providing a well-reasoned personal opinion.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example