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Writing Samples
Band 6

The table shows data about underground railway systems in six major cities with data opened, kilometres of route and passenger numbers per year in millions. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table shows data about underground railway systems in six major cities with data opened, kilometres of route and passenger numbers per year in millions. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The table compares underground railway systems in six cities in terms of their opening dates, the lengths of their routes (in
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
show examples
), and the number of
passengers
 they serve annually (in millions).
Overall
, Tokyo has the highest annual passenger numbers,
while
 London has the longest route.
In contrast
, Kyoto and Los Angeles have both the shortest networks and the lowest passenger numbers. London’s underground
system
, which opened in 1863, is the oldest and has a route length of 394
km
, serving 775
million
passengers
 annually. Paris, which launched its
system
 in 1900, has a much shorter network at 199
km
 but accommodates significantly more
passengers
 (1,191
million
). Tokyo
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 opened in 1927, serves the highest number of
passengers
 (1,928
million
) with a 155
km
 route. In the United States, Washington DC’s
system
 (1976) is 126
km
 long and serves 144
million
passengers
,
while
 Los Angeles,
opened
Correct pronoun usage
which opened
show examples
 in 2001, has a much smaller
system
 of 28
km
 with only 50
million
passengers
. Kyoto’s railway, launched in 1981, is the shortest at 11
km
, carrying 45
million
passengers
 annually.
Submitted by elmiribrahimli377 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words passengers, system, km, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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