Advertising influences consumer behavior, more negatively than positively. Do you agree or disagree?

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The topic of advertising has sparked much debate in recent years.
While
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some part of society
believes
Correct subject-verb agreement
believe
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that marketing schemes have an unfavourable effect on the buyers rather than the advantages, I strongly agree with
this
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viewpoint as it only creates a strong desire and erosion of savings. The foremost point to consider is that advertisements stimulate
desire
Add an article
the desire
a desire
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for unnecessary shopping. To illustrate it, businesses invested huge expenses in the promotion of their goods despite showing any negative aspects to society. A good example of
this
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is
promotion
Add an article
the promotion
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of beauty products through several television ads where the “picture-perfect” body shape and glowing skin are represented among women.
This
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kind of pseudo product that a person can boost confidence only through the paid class.
Thus
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, fake promotional videos have a critical effect on the mentality of the consumers as individuals feel difficulty in distinguishing between needs and desires. Another compelling argument is the depletion of personal savings. To
ellaborate
Correct your spelling
elaborate
further
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, people find happiness by purchasing multiple luxurious items for themselves. Nowadays, the young generation tries to mimic the lifestyle of their favourite role models.
Due to
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this
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reason, teenagers take debt from the credit councils to own that branded clothing.
According to
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a survey of the Scotia Bank in Canada around 60% of credit utilization is observed to shop for dresses and modern gadgets from the stipulated brands.
Hence
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,
this
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kind of demand has a detrimental effect on the stable expenditure of the family.
Overall
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, undoubtedly advertisements seem to be more unprofitable for the customers.
This
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is because it stimulates the desire to purchase non-essential items that bring a feeling of being materialistic and affect the stable income of a person.
Therefore
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, I strongly agree with
this
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statement.

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task achievement
Try to develop your ideas more clearly and comprehensively, making sure that each point is thoroughly explored.
coherence cohesion
Use clearer transitional phrases and linking words to improve the logical flow between your ideas.
introduction conclusion present
The essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which frames your argument nicely.
supported main points
Your main points are supported with specific examples, such as the survey from the Scotia Bank, which adds credibility to your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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