Some people believe that the effective way to reduce industrial pollution is to tax the companies which cause these types of pollution. others think that there are other ways. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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Many humans agree that the efficient
way
Use synonyms
to cut industrial pollution is to
making
Wrong verb form
make
show examples
higher taxes for industries which
are
Verb problem
has
show examples
made
this
Linking Words
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
happen. But some
people
Use synonyms
do believe that there
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
has to be another
way
Use synonyms
of
sollution
Correct your spelling
solution
of
this
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problem
Use synonyms
. In
this
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essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will discuss both types of views and will give my opinion.
Firstly
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, increasing taxes for manufacturing companies
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is a good approach to
resove
Correct your spelling
resolve
the
problem
Use synonyms
. What I mean by
this
Linking Words
is those fees will directly go to the Government to
elliminate
Correct your spelling
eliminate
the dirtiness
that
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is appeared
Wrong verb form
appears
show examples
in the
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
.
For instance
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Kazakhstan globally is known as a republic which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
highly producing coal, which itself contaminates the local
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
badly.
As a result
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,
inhabitans
Correct your spelling
inhabitants
of rural areas are suffering different types of diseases and soil
poisining
Correct your spelling
poisoning
. Here,
country
Add an article
the country
a country
show examples
may use extra money in
budget
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the budget
show examples
to
funding
Wrong verb form
fund
show examples
this
Linking Words
problem
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.
Secondly
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, other
people
Use synonyms
believe that there is
other
Change the wording
another
show examples
way
Use synonyms
of solution,
such
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as using
Add an article
the high
show examples
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
filters in
industry
Add an article
the industry
show examples
.
That is
Linking Words
to
say
Add a comma
say,
show examples
companies are producing a lot of
remnats
Correct your spelling
remnants
and polluted
dusts
Change the wording
dust
specks of dust
clouds of dust
bags of dust
show examples
in the fabrics which are creating
Correct article usage
a banch
show examples
banch
Correct your spelling
bunch
of problems in the air and soil.
Therefore
Linking Words
, rather than fighting with outcomes, better to make a good
preventage
Correct your spelling
percentage
of land and
people
Use synonyms
who are
exposing
Wrong verb form
exposed
show examples
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
Linking Words
dirtiness.
For example
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, oil and gas filters in rags
worlwide
Correct your spelling
worldwide
are preventing
Correct article usage
the enviroment
show examples
enviroment
Correct your spelling
environment
from
catastrophe
Add an article
the catastrophe
a catastrophe
show examples
of
poisining
Correct your spelling
poisoning
.
As well as
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,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
it is a good preventage of ECO system.
To sum up
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, many
people
Use synonyms
argee
Correct your spelling
agree
argue
that the effective
way
Use synonyms
to reduce industrial pollution is
increase
Change the verb form
to increase
increasing
show examples
the taxes for companies, others
are believe
Change the verb form
believe
show examples
that filters and modernising
industry
Correct article usage
the industry
show examples
system could be more
benefitial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
.
However
Linking Words
, I do believe that both of them are productive ways of resolution of
this
Linking Words
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
huge
problem
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by aliyasn86 on

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coherence cohesion
Consider avoiding repetition and focus on presenting a variety of ideas to enhance the complexity and depth of your argumentation.
task achievement
Strengthen your task response by ensuring all examples directly support your argument. Some points lacked clear ties to the overarching argument.
language use
Some of the grammatical errors can be improved for greater clarity and fluency, although they do not severely obscure the meaning.
task achievement
You clearly introduced both perspectives on the issue, showing an understanding of the task requirements.
coherence cohesion
It was commendable that you included personal insights in your conclusion to present a balanced opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial deterrent
  • adopt cleaner technologies
  • emissions
  • environmental impact
  • standards
  • emission caps
  • pollution control devices
  • green technologies
  • sustainable practices
  • subsidies
  • eco-friendly solutions
  • punitive measures
  • public awareness campaigns
  • consumer pressure
  • environmental footprint
  • sustainable practices
  • stricter enforcement
  • severe penalties
  • combined approach
  • combat industrial pollution
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