Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others think that gaining work experience and skills is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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It is believed that university, having the resources and experiments, is the preferable way for people to have a successful career,
whereas
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others argue that
work
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experience
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as well as
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personal
skills
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is more important. Both perspectives have valid points, but in my opinion, a balanced approach is best. On the one hand, those who believe higher education is important state that it can provide
individuals
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with essential theoretical knowledge. Universities have access to advanced resources unavailable outside of the campus, which enables students to gain in-depth knowledge in their chosen fields.
In addition
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, many employers view a degree as a marker of competence and dedication, which can enhance an individual's employability and earning potential.
For instance
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, professions
such
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as medicine, engineering, and law require formal qualifications unattainable through higher education.
Furthermore
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, universities offer opportunities for networking with peers and industry professionals, which can be instrumental in securing internships or job placements.
On the other hand
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, opponents of
this
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view point out that developing personal
skills
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and
work
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experience
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is a better way to achieve successful resumes, as practical knowledge often outweighs theoretical understanding in many industries. Hands-on
experience
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enables
individuals
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to adapt to real-world problems and acquire
skills
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that cannot be taught in the classroom.
For example
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, many technology companies prioritize hiring candidates with proven
experience
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in coding and software development, even if they lack formal qualifications.
Therefore
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, prioritizing
work
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experience
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to gain real-world problem-solving
skills
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would help
individuals
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build their professional resumes. In conclusion,
while
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obtaining a degree can create valuable job opportunities,
individuals
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should strive to balance their education with the development of personal
skills
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and practical
work
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experience
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.
This
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combined approach increases the likelihood of achieving a successful and fulfilling career in the future.
Submitted by azami06mufa on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph leads smoothly to the next with suitable linking phrases. This could enhance the flow of your essay even further.
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While the examples provided are relevant, adding specific statistics or recent case studies could strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides a thorough introduction and a well-rounded conclusion, encapsulating the main arguments effectively.
task achievement
Main points are well-supported with clear examples, making the argument compelling.
task achievement
Balanced discussion of both views, demonstrating a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
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