Students from disadvantaged families and rural areas are finding it difficult to gat a university education. Some people believw that universities should help them. To what extent do you agree or diasgree?

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These days, all
students
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do not have access to academic education and they have a range of matters for accessibility inasmuch as they are from poor families or live in the countryside.
Moreover
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, to solve
this
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obstacle a group of people suggest that universities spend some budget for these young generations. I subscribe to
this
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perspective owing to the fact that financial support and free accommodations for them have a positive effect on the economy. On the one hand, the fact
that is
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really important is that when the institutes across the world get money to the youth who are in bad situations to follow their education, they encourage them to study in these places. In fact, they train skilled workforces for their industries.
For example
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, most European countries offer full funds position to intelligent
students
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around the world to train them to enhance their technology and their countries' economies.
On the other hand
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, all universities across the world are in big cities, so young people who want to study in these institutes have to spend too much money on renting or buying a residence for themselves.
Additionally
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, if they do not have these budgets, they have to leave them. If universities provide various residential halls for their
students
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without money, they persuade them to study in these places and become efficient workers in their countries.
To sum up
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, in my personal view, helping
students
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with financial status and dormitories by educational institutions creates a chance for companies to have good employees and improve the level of technology and the economy.

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Try to include a broader range of examples to support your points. This would enhance your arguments and provide a clearer understanding of the issues at hand.
coherence and cohesion
Work on sentence structure and vocabulary to elevate the overall fluency of your writing. Varied sentence lengths and more precise language can improve the reader's engagement with your essay.
task achievement
You have included relevant arguments and presented your perspective clearly, which is commendable.
coherence and cohesion
Your conclusion summarizes the main ideas well and reflects your opinion clearly, providing a satisfactory ending to your essay.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • disadvantaged families
  • rural areas
  • university education
  • social equality
  • scholarships
  • mentorship programs
  • financial aid
  • outreach programs
  • enrollment
  • collaborative partnerships
  • pathways
  • educational goals
  • access to resources
  • transportation challenges
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