The money given to help poor countries does not solve the problem of poverty, so rich countries should give other types of help instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Giving excessive amounts of money to impoverished
countries
to solve their problems has been a vital topic of debate. Use synonyms
While
some people argue that rich Linking Words
nations
can Use synonyms
offer
assistance in other Use synonyms
ways
of helping, I strongly agree with Use synonyms
this
trend and believe that affluent Linking Words
countries
can help developing Use synonyms
countries
in different practical Use synonyms
ways
.
Use synonyms
Firstly
, poor Linking Words
countries
inherently have faced various challenges, so devoting Use synonyms
an excessive amounts
of money might not solve these Correct the article-noun agreement
excessive amounts
an excessive amount
overall
difficulties. Linking Words
Therefore
, rich communities can Linking Words
offer
help to poor Use synonyms
nations
in various practical Use synonyms
ways
, Use synonyms
such
as improving their educational systems, which Linking Words
is
not only Unnecessary verb
apply
help
individuals improve their Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
knowledges
, leading to Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
learn
new skills but Change the verb form
learning
also
can Linking Words
countribute
to Correct your spelling
contribute
create
more Wrong verb form
creating
jobs
opportunities in societies. Change the noun form
job
For instance
, some students Linking Words
due to
financial strain Linking Words
could not
pursue their educational goals and Wrong verb form
cannot
ambitious
, Replace the word
ambitions
as a
Linking Words
result
developed Add the comma(s)
result,
nations
can Use synonyms
offer
online courses to help these students Use synonyms
enrolling
in online education institutes.
Wrong verb form
enrol
Conversely
, some sectors in rich Linking Words
countries
need to improve Use synonyms
effectivelly
Correct your spelling
effectively
such
as the Linking Words
health
sector. Use synonyms
Thus
, dedicating Linking Words
efficient
budget to these sectors can not solve their problems completely, so if rich Correct article usage
an efficient
countries
can Use synonyms
offer
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
health advanced
technologies to poor communities, Add a hyphen
health-advanced
this
approach can significantly enhance Linking Words
health
programmes in order to decrease Use synonyms
health
issues. A prime illustration is the period of Use synonyms
COVIDE 19
, so the best solution is Correct your spelling
COVID-19
that
Correct word choice
for
,
developed Remove the comma
apply
countries
Use synonyms
equip
poor Fix the infinitive
to equip
nations
with practical technologies and sorts of knowledge to decrease the severe Use synonyms
pandomic
issues.
In conclusion, it becomes clear thatCorrect your spelling
pandemic
,
devoting amounts of budget to poor Remove the comma
apply
nations
can not solve their various challenges. Use synonyms
While
there are practical Linking Words
ways
to reduce their challenges, Use synonyms
such
as improving their educational systems, I strongly advocate for Linking Words
this
perspective and believe that the money given to impoverished Linking Words
countries
could not solve their difficulties.Use synonyms
Submitted by mahanz on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and flows smoothly into the next with the use of appropriate linking devices.
task achievement
Clarify and refine your explanations for better clarity and depth.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction clearly states your position and sets the tone for the rest of the essay.
supported main points
The essay presents valid points on how rich countries can help improve education and health in poorer nations.