Students should focus on learning in the classroom rather than show their status by wearing fashionable clothes. Therefore, all students have to wear school uniforms. Do you agree or disagree with this statement.

#students #focus #classroom #show #status #clothes #school #uniforms

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These days,

focus

Add an article

the focus

show examples

of most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

students

Use synonyms

is on showing

Replace the word

off

show examples

their fashion in

form

Correct article usage

the form

show examples

of fancy

cloth

Fix the agreement mistake

clothes

show examples

rather than studies.

This

Linking Words

scenario

rise

Verb problem

raised

show examples

multiple views among parents some think that

this

Linking Words

is normal but some conclude

this

Linking Words

Correct your spelling

show examples

wrong and

all

Correct word choice

that all

show examples

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

should wear

school

Use synonyms

uniform

Fix the agreement mistake

uniforms

show examples

. I will elaborate on it

further

Linking Words

and give my opinions in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

further

Linking Words

paragraphs.

To begin

Linking Words

with in the past during time period of Gurukuls and Ashrams ,

students

Use synonyms

were forced to wear simple

cloth

Correct your spelling

clothes

show examples

uniform

Fix the agreement mistake

uniforms

show examples

Due to

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

similar outfit of all

students

Use synonyms

, they treat each other equally whether they are children of any king or

Remove the article

apply

show examples

simple labour.

This

Linking Words

rose

Verb problem

raised

show examples

morals of equality among kids

Correct word choice

and

show examples

teenagers during that time. But these rules are no More and

Students

Use synonyms

are allowed to wear whatever they want to.

Moreover

Linking Words

, these days

students

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spend hours

Change preposition

apply

show examples

deciding what will they wear in class. Their focus is always on how they are looking and

wether

Correct your spelling

whether

show examples

their friends or Classmates are noticing their clothes or not.

Linking Words

Further more

Correct your spelling

Furthermore

show examples

According to

Linking Words

a study conducted by

University

Correct article usage

the University

show examples

of California,

students

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school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

show examples

with proper dress

code

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codes

show examples

were more sincere,

disciplined

Correct word choice

and disciplined

show examples

and

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

leaned toward

academics

Fix the agreement mistake

academic

show examples

gols

Correct your spelling

goals

as compared to those schools ,where

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

wear clothes

according to

Linking Words

their will. In conclusion, I completely agree with the statement that student nowadays are busy

Change preposition

apply

show examples

showing their status by wearing fancy clothes rather than their academics. I personally

thinks

Change the verb form

think

show examples

that

students

Use synonyms

should always wear

school

Use synonyms

uniform

Fix the agreement mistake

uniforms

show examples

during

school

Use synonyms

hours

although

Linking Words

ther

Correct your spelling

there

will be certain

time

Fix the agreement mistake

times

show examples

when they can wear

dress

Fix the agreement mistake

dresses

show examples

according to

Linking Words

their taste

Linking Words

for

Add the comma(s)

, for

show examples

instance , annual

function

Fix the agreement mistake

functions

show examples

school

Use synonyms

farewell

Fix the agreement mistake

farewells

show examples

, but rest of the days they must

be wearing

Wrong verb form

wear

show examples

proper

school

Use synonyms

dress.

Submitted by poonam.tushir0099 on Mon Dec 30 2024

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coherence cohesion

Try to maintain a clear and logical structure throughout the essay. While you have introduced your topic and provided a conclusion, the transition between ideas in the body paragraphs can be improved to enhance overall coherence.

task achievement

Make your ideas more comprehensive and well-developed. Some points are introduced but not thoroughly explained or supported, which could strengthen your argument.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to illustrate your points. This can help to make your argument more persuasive and better support your main ideas.

coherence cohesion

You have provided a clear introduction that outlines the issue and your stance on the subject.

task achievement

The conclusion effectively summarizes your opinion and aligns with your main arguments presented in the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
38
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

287 words

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Students should focus on learning in the classroom rather than show their status by wearing fashionable clothes. Therefore, all students have to wear school uniforms. Do you agree or disagree with this statement.

Fully explain your ideas

Some museums charge for admission while others are free. Do you think the advantages of charging people for admission to museums outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties having enough sleep what are problems caused by lack of sleep? what can be done about this lack of sleep? #people #difficulties

Nowadays there is a trend of rapid increase in already excessive use of natural resources such as oil, forest and freshwater. What dangers does it bring? what are the possible solutions to address these issues?