These days, we are seeing an increasing amount of violence on television, and this is having a negative impact on children's behaviour. Do you agree or disagree?

#amount #violence #television #impact #children #behaviour

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The increasing amount of

violence

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on television

appearing

Wrong verb form

appears

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dramatically nowadays, and

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

negatively impacts our

children

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's behaviour when they watch violent news when they are

Change preposition

show examples

a young age. And

agrreeing

Correct your spelling

agree

that

kids

Use synonyms

when they observe violent behaviours

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

will reflect on their attitude and

this

Linking Words

will be proven. The increasing

violence

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has kept us in fear for our

kids

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, and leaving the phone and television unrestricted to our

children

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will impact massively young ages. The

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violence

Replace the word

violent

show examples

news

causing

Wrong verb form

causes

show examples

violent reflections on a child's mind and that may affect the temper of him or her. Study shows that when keeping the

kids

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watching movies or cartons that have

aggrresive

Correct your spelling

aggressive

behaviour by a

charachter

Correct your spelling

character

, they definitely will follow the

charchter

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character

gestures.

Children

Use synonyms

are

Change preposition

show examples

the age of learning, and keeping them observing

vilolent

Correct your spelling

violent

news, their mind will question

about

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apply

show examples

it.

Linking Words

addition

Add a comma

addition,

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they will think why and how that

hppens

Correct your spelling

happens

For

Linking Words

example

Add a comma

example,

show examples

when they watch a crime that someone stap the other they may step into the kitchen and pull the knife from the

drwer

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drawer

dryer

and do like what they saw with their brothers and sisters. In the end, it is better for

the

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apply

show examples

parents to make restrictions on their

children

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under the age of 18 on television and phone, because the increasing amount of

violence

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is huge and won't decline and they should be careful and afraid

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show examples

their

kids

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watching, so they won't absorb any bad attitude that reflects on their

kids

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' minds. And having

Correct article usage

a save

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save

Replace the word

safe

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and secure home from aggressive

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

Submitted by mohnnad.als on Mon Dec 30 2024

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coherence

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supporting examples

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task response

The essay addresses the topic and provides a clear position.

structure

Both introduction and conclusion are present, framing the essay well.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

253 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

desensitize
mimicking
aggressive
idolize
fear or anxiety
social interactions
mental health
proactive
supervision
content

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These days, we are seeing an increasing amount of violence on television, and this is having a negative impact on children's behaviour. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people say history is one of the most important school subjects. Othe people think that in today's world subjects like science and technology are more important than history. Discuss both points and give your opinion

People nowsday tends to have children at older ages. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages.

Creative artists should always be given the freedom to express their own ideas in words, pictures, music, or film, in whichever way they wish. There should be no government restrictions on what they do. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this option?