IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that universities should only offer places to students with high marks, while others believe that people of all ages should be allowed even if they don’t do well in school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #universities #offer #places #students #marks #ages #don’t #school
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Education has become an indispensable part of our life.Some people say that academic
institution
Fix the agreement mistake
institutions
show examples
 should
provides
Change the verb form
provide
show examples
 only for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
pupil
Fix the agreement mistake
pupils
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 who complete their schooling with high grades in all modules.
However
Linking Words
,others believe that educational academics should allocate all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
age
Use synonyms
 groups.In
this
Linking Words
 essay ,I will elaborate on both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
viewpoints in detail and reach a logical conclusion.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,after finishing
the
Correct article usage
apply
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schooling,most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
scholar prefer to start their career
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 early life
instead
Linking Words
 of going to university.
This
Linking Words
 is mainly occurring
due to
Linking Words
 school children did not get the
oppurtunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 for
higer
Correct your spelling
higher
 studies.
Moreover
Linking Words
,students with higher marks have the ability to achieve a good future.Because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
they have the capability and particular skills for learning .
For instance
Linking Words
,some report shows that students who pass with more marks in
academy
Add an article
the academy
show examples
 have the
chances
Fix the agreement mistake
chance
show examples
 to get
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
good marks in degree courses. On the other side,some individuals think that
age
Use synonyms
 is just a number to learn at
colleges
Fix the agreement mistake
college
show examples
.Humans
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
old
age
Use synonyms
 have the skill to understand simply
due to
Linking Words
 their experiences and knowledge even if there
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 low grades in schools.
Moreover
Linking Words
,the older
age
Use synonyms
 people considered the study
is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
 important to get a job.
Hence
Linking Words
,they will struggle to take a course.
For example
Linking Words
,25 per cent of learners in the college are at the
age
Use synonyms
 of 50.
However
Linking Words
,they are getting better
mark
Fix the agreement mistake
marks
show examples
 in each module.So,giving
oppurtunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
 to any
age
Use synonyms
 group is not a big deal to colleges. In conclusion,
academic
Add an article
an academic
show examples
 institution is essential for learning for
school
Add an article
a school
show examples
 child who
achieve
Change the verb form
achieves
show examples
 a good future in their lives.
Linking Words
Although
Correct word choice
However
show examples
,we need to consider the people who are
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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old
age
Use synonyms
 .I believe that they can learn
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
thing
Fix the agreement mistake
things
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due to
Linking Words
 their
experienced
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
show examples
life
Change preposition
in life
show examples
.
Submitted by renimahesan92 on

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task achievement
Try to enhance the argument by providing specific and varied examples to strengthen your points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a logical progression of ideas with better use of linking words to connect points smoothly.
task achievement
Avoid repetition and aim for more concise expression to improve clarity.
coherence cohesion
You have included an introduction and conclusion, which frames the essay nicely.
task achievement
Both viewpoints are discussed, showcasing a balanced perspective.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes your viewpoint, showing personal engagement with the topic.
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